It's really an honor to get to marry another cousin (out of context this statement is really funny!) Actually now that I look back at it, all three weddings that I have done have all been special. I have also picked up a few lessons from each that i will not forget.
I love weddings because you get to see people's personalities really come out and shape the whole experience. The weddings I have been a part of have really showcased who the people are that are being married with everything from the music, the venue, the ceremony, etc. One of the best examples of those has been Brad and Noelle Otts wedding. The music, the place (which was an awesome wine cellar), the Rice Krispy Castle groom cake. Everything was THEM!
Anyway, on to the lessons I have learned:
1. Always do or have someone do pre-marital counseling! I do not want to go into much detail here but this is something that I will vow to make sure is done for any wedding that I say yes to.
2. Don't be afraid of humor!!! Many of us have this idea that a wedding is supposed to be a Stoic, straight faced affair. But it's supposed to be a celebration! Laughing, cheering, celebrating should be part of the wedding ceremony. Not only are people pleasantly surprised when something is funny in a wedding , (depending on the people of course) it gives the bride and groom a chance to breathe and lighten up a little so they can actually enjoy the ceremony. It's a real stress breaker. I know that I appreciated it immensely in my wedding and others have done the same. There is a danger of course. There is appropriate funny in a wedding and innappropriate funny in a wedding but you learn which is which in due time!
3. Hopefully the people you marry will be people that you know intimately but sometimes they are not. Sometimes you are doing it as a favor for someone you know or for family you may not know well or just people in your community that you have not spent a ton of time with. Get to know the people as well as you possibly can. Spend time with them, hear their story, find out how they met, find out what they like, everything you can to ensure you truly know them before going into a wedding ceremony. How can you highlight a couple and their commitment if you don't really know who they are?
4. Remember, this is a wedding which is a celebration of two people committing their lives together before God. This is not a chance for you to showcase your expositional skills on a difficult text of Scripture. Sure, you should give a biblical framework of what marriage is. But this is no time to "make a point" or to have an agenda. What I mean by that is that many ministers drool thinking, "this is my chance to speak in front of a large group of people who may or may not go to church. This is my chance to evangelize" It may be true that it is a great chance for people to hear of God's love for them but do not abuse that privelege. This is about the couple that stands before you first and foremost.
5. Don't drink too many white wine spritzers or you could end up like this guy!
Anyway, those are just a few things I have learned that I felt like spouting off. Hopefully that is helpful to someone out there. But again, since I have only done three wedding, I think i probably have about 1000 more things to learn.
Anyone else have any lessons they would like to share?
3 comments:
Oh man...
low blow!
i feel like we're even from the forehead hicky incident now!
i liked what you said in number 4 about some people having an agenda behind what they say...i have seen that before and somehow it just feels a bit wrong to me.
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