Today my knee took a bad turn so I've been literally sitting on my couch all day long watching Seinfeld, writing emails, literally sitting and staring at the ceiling at times. Because of that it's almost like I had a day long silent retreat. I've thought a lot today and realized that I'm really in a preparation stage right now in every aspect of my life. I'm preparing for a new church, preparing for a new marriage, preparing my knee to be strong again....and more stuff that you don't care about. Preparation is a tough position to be in. You don't get to see any fruits, you are just stepping out in faith believing that all of the things you are doing during this time will pay off. It's hard to believe that sometimes.
I can't wait until Spring! By spring my knee will be fully rehabilitated, we'll have a lot of wedding stuff done, we'll be meeting for church! So much will happen in the Spring! It's tough right now not seeing anything happen but just waiting. Waiting sucks! I read one of my favorite passages tonight and it encouraged me.
"Therefore since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run wiht perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning it's shame and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart." Heb. 12:1-3
It's clear that during this waiting period that there needs to be a focus. This time is a great opportunity to prepare myself for what I have ahead in every aspect, spiritually, emotionally, physically. I don't want to look back on this time knowing that I wasted it and I am the same person that I was before. God help me.
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