I thought this picture from before our wedding deserved some captions.

Late Night Octopus

Last night about an hour after Kelli and I had fallen asleep I awoke to blood-tingling, murderous screaming right next to me. I heard loud screams of "Get it off of me", "Help!", and more "Get it off, get it off." I woke up and instantly grabbed Kelli, whom these screams were convulsing out of and in my 2am mind tried to figure out what was going on. I kept telling her that it was alright and everything was fine. I finally realized she was having a nightmare. So I asked her what it was and what she said certainly took me by surprise but with completely straight, scared face she managed to get out, "it was an octopus." Hahahahaha. hahahahahaha. Oh man. I've never had a nightmare about an octopus but I can tell you after that experience, I don't want to! Must be terrifying!

Job Description

While checking out ministry jobs online today I came across this job description.

• • Minimum of 3 years full time experience leading a college and / or young adult ministry in a church of at least 2000 in weekend attendance
• • Currently on staff at a church of 2000+ in attendance
• • At least 3 years substantial numerical growth in college or young adult ministry
• • Must be open to the regular use of the gifts of the Spirit, including speaking in tongues and the interpretation of tongues

Ok, obviously very few would get excited about applying for this job because it's apparent from this that the most important thing to this church is numerical growth. But put that aside.

If you fit this description, meaning you are leading a church of at least 2000 and have had 3 years of substantial numerical growth, why would you leave? I think this one's going to be hard to fill. Not many pastors I know are going to say, "yeah, the heck with this booming, growing ministry. I'm outta here!"

Sweet Justice

T.O. Suspension Upheld.

Take that Drew Rosensuck.

This Sunday!

Kelli and I get to go to the Bears/Bucs game this weekend! YES! My friend George has a few extra tickets and offered them to us! WOOHOO. We're so excited! GO BEARS!

Why I love Thomas Merton.

“If our life is poured out in useless words we will never hear anything in the depths of our hearts, where Christ lives and speaks in silence. We will never be anything, and in the end, when the time comes for us to declare who and what we are, we shall be found speechless at the moment of the crucial decision: for we shall have said everything and exhausted ourselves in speech before we had anything to say.”

I'm the definition of a nerd.

There's no question that I love to read and usually end up reading about 40-50 books a year, although this year was quite lower for some reason, might have been the chaos of getting married, job transition, moving, etc. One of my favorite things to do is to make a reading list for the following year which I did while sitting down the other night with Kelli. I generally write down what I know I can read and then end up reading more along the way as authors I like come out with books I didn't know were coming or people tell me I must read something. Some of the books on this list came from other's recommendations, or a feeling that if i'm a literature fan at all there are certain books that I must read. Because I had a poor public school education you will notice books i probably should have read such as Slaughterhouse Five and Brave New World. I have also taken some recommendations from other blogs as I have seen what other people I respect are reading, checked it out and felt intrigued by reading it as well. So without any more nerdery, here is my reading list for 2006.

Feel free to leave any other books you might recommend. I'd be happy to check them out!

Literature and Poetry:
Town and City – Jack Kerouac
The Brothers Karamazov – Dostoevsky
Wise Blood – Flannery O’Connor
Leaves of Grass – Walt Whitman
Complete Poems of Wendell Berry
Anna Karenina – Leo Tolstoy
To A God Unknown – John Steinbeck
Travels with Charley; In Search of America – John Steinbeck
Slaughterhouse Five – Vonnegut
Brave New World – Huxley
Fahrenheit 451 – Bradbury
Heart of Darkness – Joseph Conrad
The Waste Land – TS Eliot

Non-Fiction:
On Earth as it is in Advertising – Eman
Wishful Thinking – Buechner
Organic Faith – Neil Cole
The Importance of Being Foolish – Brennan Manning
The Gospel According to Moses – Dickson
Practicioners: Voices within the Emergent Movement – Russinger
Communicating for a Change – Andy Stanley
The Challenge of Jesus – N.T. Wright
Preaching: Re-imagined – Doug Pagitt
Jesus in the Margins – McKinley
Heaven – Randy Alcorn
The Sacred Way: Spiritual Practices for Everyday Life – Tony Jones
The Gospel According to America – David Dark
The Secret Message of Jesus – Brian Mclaren

Late Night Personal Update

It's about 2am, i'm sitting here drinking a cold Sam Adams Winter Lager (one of my favorites), listening to Red House Painters, looking out in the back yard which appears to be pitch dark but you can still see the tree line in the distance. Just thinking about what I want to do when I grow up still. It's tough to say. I feel like I will never figure out my "vocation". Is "full time, paid ministry for me?" I'm still not sure. I know ministry is for me in some context but I'm not sure about making my living from it anymore. But then again, what else can I do? I know this is something that several people with Bible College degrees have been through before and it is comforting to know there are people who understand this dilemma. I hope I don't sound like I'm whining all the time or are discouraged because I'm really not, i'm just searching and trying to figure life out like everyone else. Plus it's late at night and I'm drinking beer so of course i'm going to be introspective.

Still trying to finish up my book. I was hoping to be done by the end of the year but i'm not sure it's going to happen. I have quite a bit written so I definitely want to be completed by the summertime. I think that's reasonable. Still have some research to do. As Kelli keeps telling me, I have a lot of time to work on it now and if I don't take advantage of it I am going to regret it when I don't have that kind of time at my disposal anymore. She is right.

Thinking about New York from time to time. Seems like I just left. I can still picture everything vividly in my mind and I miss it somedays. But I also try to remember the reality of it and the difficulties that come with that city to keep things in perspective. My friend Brent Storms said during our last meeting before I left, "I know you'll be back. You just connect with people here and we'll welcome you back when you're ready." Who knows?

Kelli and I are going out to the Northwest this spring to check out Seattle, Vancouver, and Portland to see how we feel there. We're really wanting to be moving on to a new stage by next fall. We're going to enjoy this year and then hope to invest in something meaningful. I would really like to commit to something next fall for a decent period of time. Tampa is okay, but it is so saturated with churches. I just don't want to live in a Church saturated culture. I feel like it can be a hindrance to the gospel. The more I think about it, the more I think we may need to move out of the country to serve the way we would like to. I love what the church is doing in Europe and England. I just want to be in a place where there is a need for another church, or a church at all for that matter. Not in a place where there are churches competing with each other in their programming and buildings on every corner. That depresses the hell out of me. It's why I couldn't wait to leave the Midwest (minus inner-city areas of course). We'll see where God takes us. There is hope.

Our Backyard

This is about as much fall foilage as we are going to get in Tampa! Quite breathtaking isn't it?

Not long after Kelli and I were married we decided that we would each get one weekend a year to do whatever the heck we want to do regardless of the other's opinions or feelings. For example, i would love to sit in a bar and watch College Basketball all day long, but there is no way that under normal circumstances that Kelli would want to do that. So we decided to each have a Fest once a year. This weekend was Kelli-Fest 2005. We had a great time. Friday night I had a softball game where I went 3 for 3 driving in a few runs which was nice. I'm finally getting the hang of it. I did it all for KelliFest. Then we came home and watched The Interpreter, a pretty good movie she's been wanting to see forever but it's always out at Blockbuster.

Saturday we went over to Clearwater to the Marine Aquarium which rehabilitates injured or stranded turtles, dolphins and river otters. I love that place! We watched the Sea Turtles for a while and then went over to Clearwater Beach to a place called Jimmy's Fish House. It is basically a huge deck with live music and a great bar right on the beach. We sat and drank some Sangria and Rum Runners and relaxed, then we went to one of our favorite places, Bahama Breeze. The few times we've been there, we've just sat outside and had drinks but this time we decided to have dinner. The food was amazing! I had the Mahi Mahi. It's rare that we get to eat at a real restaurant with real chefs who care about their food so this was a great experience.

I honestly don't remember what we did after that. Kelli????

Sunday we got up and went to church, then ate at Winners Grill who had great Jalapeno Bottle Caps and Buffalo Chicken Sandwiches. Then we came home and watched Bewitched (with Will Farrell). Awful movie. Please don't spend your money on renting it. Please? The rest of the night is really none of your business. We haven't really gone out or done anything for a while because we don't have any money so this was a good weekend to have some fun. I was thinking tonight that it's great because even though every decision was made by Kelli this weekend I still had a great time and enjoyed everything we did. I'm glad we're this compatible. We'll see how she feels about Dustball Fest 2006 this March. I know it will involve College Basketball, Pubs, and hopefully a good concert. Sweet! I love you Kelli and had a great time at your Fest!

Weird Dream

I had the strangest dream last night. I was getting married to a woman that I can't identify because I have no idea who she was. After the ceremony we were at the reception and she got real drunk and I caught her making out with another guy. Of course I was devestated as would be expected and confronted her. She was like, "it's not that big of a deal honey, i don't even know who that guy is." To which I responded, "well, if you're getting drunk and are making out with someone else on our own wedding day, this marriage doesn't have much of a chance." (seems like common sense). So I talked to my friend Gregg who performed the wedding in the dream and he said that I should get it annulled, so I did and I was on my own again. I'm still mourning the loss today.

Frank

I just finished reading Frankenstein this afternoon. I had not read the book before but I must say that I was incredibly taken with it. What a phenomonal book. Mary Shelley was 18 when she started to write it! Where do these classic authors get their vocabulary??? Are our schools that bad? Seriously, are they just child prodigies that grow up learning much more than other kids? One of my favorite lines in the book is by the vile creature himself:

"If I Cannot Inspire Love, I Will Cause Fear."

This line has so much depth and meaning to it, I cannot even begin to apply it to humans. There's too much there.

Bagby Family Reunion

I can't remember if I ever posted this or not. But in the back row is my Dad and his five brothers. Can you guess which one my Dad is? People tend to think we look quite a bit alike. So which one is he?

R.I.P.

We'll Miss You Pumpkin.

Organic Church

This is a good article on Organic Churches. I love the idea and definitely agree with the philosophy and spirit of it. I had the opportunity to take a workshop with Neil Cole when I was in NYC which was exciting, encouraging and helpful but I still have many questions. One of the questions I have is based on the life and death cycle of the church in which he speaks of. I still don't really get it. I understand that keeping the church existing through artificial means is not good, nor natural but i still don't fully understand what it all looks like. And yes, Neil, i'm threatened by not making a salary as a "professional church guy". I'm not sure what else I can do with my education and experience. That's the scary thing about this. Anyway, read it here:

Neil Cole Speaks on Organic Church.

Pumpkin

Kelli and I's first pumpkin together. Not a bad start. All I had was a sharp knife. We didn't have all the fancy tools yet. Maybe next year.

Iron & Wine

Go buy all of these albums right now. Seriously, just do it. I'm realizing more and more how amazing Iron & Wine is. Great writer, great singer, great guitarist, great albums.

Trading Spouses

Somehow I was tricked into watching Trading Spouses last night because i wanted to see how crazy this woman really was that i have been seeing previews about FOREVER! Wow, what a display! I can't even begin to say how insane this woman is. It's too bad that TV will only put the lunatics on that profess to be Christians. This woman is one of the most evil, vile people i've ever seen on TV. Although her friends were horribly hateful and completely disrespectful as well to the woman she got swapped with. That was unreal! The man who she is living with for a week was very sensitive to her beliefs and very kind the whole time and then this woman goes nuts on everyone! I'm not even sure what to say. What I can say is that I hope the world does not believe that these people on television are a representative of Christ. They can't right? Just once i would like to see a normal Christian on Tv, not these eccentric looneys. But I guess that doesn't sell as well as the stereotype of closeminded hateful Christians. The saddest thing is, she'll probably get an award from her church or something when she gets home for standing up against evil!

Watch a Clip Here!