Dustball Galactica

Blog Change - Take Note

2011-09-27T22:53:00.000-07:00

For all three people who read this (that means you Mom!), I've officially switched my blog over to www.dustinbagby.wordpress.com

Do We Really Need Another Article About Rob Bell?

2011-09-27T17:26:00.000-07:00

Rob Bell. The name instantly ignites polarizing emotions within churches and conversations. Some people LOVE him and have made pilgrimages to Mecca (Grand Rapids) to hear him speak on his own stage. Others DESPISE him for what is interpreted as misleading people from “historic-orthodox Christianity (is their one version of this?)”.

He’s had quite a year in the news. I’m actually surprised that he has received this much press, especially from the secular news media. However, I suppose the media thrives on controversy, so what is better than a young, hip pastor questioning the Evangelical Christian faith which the media loves to hate. I was more surprised to see the news of his departing from Mars Hill from secular sources. I imagine they’re connecting the dots in the sense of: Controversy=Resignation. Which may or may not actually be the case.

All we really know is what he’s written in his official statement that he’s decided that it’s time to leave Mars Hill for the purpose of writing and teaching to a broader audience. He’s starting that venture by moving to L.A. which I find to be a curious choice.

My most cynical self wants to make a statement like: “Gone are the days when pastors hear God calling them to live in pallid conditions to proclaim the good news to native tribesman who may or may not kill them. Now pastors are growing large churches and “hearing a call” to move to an affluent celebrity-saturated city and leave the difficulties of pastoral ministry to live off of royalties of books that without the weird spacing would amount to about a mid-length term paper.” Is that cynical enough for you?

My most understanding self wants to cut the guy a break. “Who KNOWS all that has led up to this decision and where it will lead. Who am I to judge his motives? What do I know about what God has in store for him? Any attempt to write on this is fairly speculative and will fall short and possibly even misrepresent what is going on.” Is that TOO gracious?

I’ll admit that maybe I’m over-thinking this, perhaps I’m misjudging his motives or being overly critical. But regardless, the feeling I’m left with in thinking about Rob Bell’s trajectory is disappointment. Why? Because the inherent message is the typical American dream mindset of I’m sure God wants me to be “reaching a wider audience”, “expanding my influence”, etc. And the assumption is, this is not possible WHILE being a pastor in a local church. Somehow either the church administration or association hinders the influence of this one individual.

(Which I think if Augustine teaches us anything it is that while he may have resented the burdensome amount of time that many of his pastoral and administrative tasks took, he was still able to write more works than you will ever read AND be quite influential).

In my more negative moments I speculate Rob Bell’s departure doing a few things:

His leaving makes those who have faded from a local expression of church because it’s “hard” to be in community with such a diversity of people feel vindicated for their decision. In fact, it almost makes it virtuous. "We TOO have left our church to make God’s message of love known to a broader audience." (To which I would ask: “who are you telling about Jesus?”) It also remains to be seen how leaving Mars Hill will lead to him teaching to a wider audience.
Rob Bell will continue to embrace his identity as a “celebrity preacher”, tour, write books, make lots of money and be a guest on Dancing with the Stars in 5 years (God forbid that show still exist). And ironically, those that are most judgmental of celebrity-ism, the misuse of wealth, and the lack of serving the poor in the church will still LOVE him.
The motivation to reach a wider audience is a dangerous one at best. When musicians aim at this, it typically involves compromising musical integrity and putting out any number of songs you hear on popular radio. I would hate to see that same kind of compromise happen with Rob Bell’s theology and teaching (although some believe it to be too late for that). Obviously, controversial books sell and make A LOT of money. It’s a temptation for every pastor and writer to put out what is appealing to our modern sensibilities and tells us what we want to hear.

However, in my more optimistic, hopeful moments, this is where I hope it all leads:

When Rob Bell moves to Los Angeles, he gets connected to a local church where he is committed to living his life of faith in community with other people. People he can serve, encourage, and challenge, and who will serve, encourage, and challenge him back. No one, even Rob Bell is beyond the need for community in terms of coming to maturity in Jesus.
I also hope he continues to creatively teach people about Jesus. I have been personally encouraged and challenged by a number of Mp3’s and conference sermons from him in the past. I hope to continue to benefit from those.
I would love to see Rob Bell write a book that is not founded and marketed on controversy, but is founded on solid and substantive theology and exegesis. He clearly has it in him, someone just needs to show him how to create footnotes to cite his work. :)

Some of you may be wondering, why does it matter what you want him to do? Honestly, it doesn’t. What this event does bring up is something of a much more personal nature as someone who is committed to the local church.

The question I am forced to ask myself is: What would I do if I had this same opportunity? (don’t laugh) If I was financially secure (due to book sales or anything else), would I continue to do ministry in the local church? Would I persevere through the difficult seasons and challenging people? Or would I head for greener pastures trading in the complexities and headaches of ministry for something more attractive and potentially less challenging? Devin Vaughn asks me these kinds of hypothetical questions ALL THE TIME. “If Deschutes Brewery offered you 150,000 dollars to come brew for them, would you give up ministry?” (As you can see, his hypotheticals rarely resemble reality). But he’s looking for my bottom dollar. He’s essentially asking, “How committed are you to this thing? How much do you believe in it?”

I would like to say that I would trust that Jesus is right; that His body comprised of odd-balls, sinners, addicts, children, saints and all the rest is worth investing and rooting myself in. I also know that I don’t always feel this way. Ask me this question on a Sunday afternoon after a particularly humbling morning, or after a particularly frustrating interaction and I may quite a different disposition (ask my wife).

But we do need to ask ourselves the question: Is participating in the local expression of church ‘worth it’? If we are seeking to be people who are growing in love, forgiveness, compassion, patience, kindness, etc. is there a context more fitted to do that than the local church? If everyone has a price, what is yours? When does church become too “hard” to be worth it? Or when does something else become too attractive to stick around? These are hard questions, but they’re helpful in gauging our own level of commitment to Jesus and His family. And if for nothing else, I believe these kinds of questions are worth another tiresome article on Rob Bell.

Should we always strive to be "authentic"?

2011-09-06T14:11:00.000-07:00

Authenticity has been a buzz word in church circles for the last 10 years (at least?). It is one of the most sought after and prized “virtues” in the Christian community. Are you being authentic? Are you being true to yourself? Are you being genuine?

I understand the drive to increased authenticity in the church. This clearly comes from a reaction against the phoniness that we’ve felt and experienced in our past church experiences. People get dressed up, they put on a smile, the answer to “how are you doing?” is always “GREAT!”, etc. WIth a tiny bit of intuition and a small period of time, it's easy to know when people are being phony. And life is simply too short to be a part of a church where people fake their way through life.

Therefore, to strive for more honesty among fellow Christ-followers makes sense. But in our quest to be authentic at all times, it's not long before you’ve got to ask the question: “What if your authentic self sucks?” Or “Is it always helpful for you or for others to be authentic?” If in this present moment I'm genuinely a very greedy or lustful, or _________________ person, what good does it do me to embrace authenticity?

First, I have concluded that there are times when it is not healthy for you to be authentic with yourself. Generally speaking, simply camping out on how you feel gets you nowhere, but usually leads you deeper into the rut of whatever that feeling may be.

For instance, in the church context what do you do when you don’t feel like worshipping? What many people do is they simply "be authentic" to how they feel. They sit down and don’t make any kind of effort to do anything that their “self” doesn’t feel like doing. I don't feel like standing, so I'm not going to stand. Maybe next week if I feel like singing praises to God, I will. If not, I won’t. And that is often admired as a virtuous act of the genuine self.

But is that the best thing for you? (or others?). I’ve come to conclude that it is not helpful for either. In fact, in scripture we get a much different sense when people don’t feel like worshiping. For instance, David in Psalm 103 infers that he may have been in a place of not feeling like worship.

But rather he preaches to the inmost depths of his being trying to stir himself up, to invigorate him to worship:

1 Praise the LORD, my soul;
all my inmost being, praise his holy name.
2 Praise the LORD, my soul,
and forget not all his benefits—

He’s literally talking to himself, commanding himself to praise the Lord. How does that happen? By not forgetting his benefits. And then he goes on to recount all of the benefits of God’s loyal love. And in this way, he initially is listening to what his heart is saying. Presumably that is “I don’t feel like praising God.” But he does more than just listen and accept what his "self" is telling him. He actually goes the next step and preaches truth to his inmost being. He is telling it, “This is why you should feel like praising God.” He’s contemplating on God’s covenant love (specifically what that love tangibly cost) UNTIL he feels like praising God. We however tend to make the mistake of waiting it out, or rather anticipating that someday in the near future we may feel like worshiping God again. But there is another way that the Psalmist models for us beautifully. Should you be genuine with yourself and listen to what your heart is telling you? Yes, absolutely. Should you stay there until it changes? Definitely not. You can actually change how you feel.

Second, there are times when it is not healthy or helpful for OTHERS for you to be authentic.

For some authenticity has become an excuse to air their grievances with humanity, with the church, and with themselves with no restraint and in a way that is hurtful, vindictive, selfish, and obnoxious. They come and puke up everything they’re feeling and leave the rest of the community sitting around smelling the vomit on the ground (metaphorically speaking of course!). They are slaves to the whims of their feelings and thoughts and show no restraint or thoughtfulness to what may be inappropriate in regard to context or relationship.

I have known people who have simply taken it for granted that it is always best to be honest about what they’re thinking and feeling EVEN when it is hurtful to other people. Their philosophy is, “Shouldn’t I be able to be honest with Christian brothers and sisters even if it’s hurtful or blunt? Shouldn’t they simply understand and have to forgive me?”

The simple answer is “No, you cannot.” I cannot even begin to understand how such a self-centered and narcissistic view has any merit in the body of Christ. It’s the attitude (thankfully not all that common) that I should be able to be myself and everyone just has to deal with it. I can assure you that there is nothing healthy or helpful about this approach (for yourself or for others).

In his letters to the church, Paul uses strong words in regard to your actions like “restrain, abstain, repent, correct, rebuke, etc.” Those are not words that are anything close to synonymous with “just be yourself, everyone has to deal with it.” No, Paul assumes that there are times when you being yourself is the worst possible decision in terms of other’s edification. And in those cases we must give up our right “to be ourselves” FOR the sake of others. (read 1 Corinthians for an entire test case of this).

Sometimes, out of discipline, you simply have to strive to be better than your current-self. The question of course is, when is it best to be transparent and when is it best to show restraint?

I think the answer to that is found in the nature of the relationship. Not all relationships are meant to be in the category of “intimate”. Intimate relationships are reserved for those few, close, meaningful relationships that you have with 1-3 other people including a spouse. The fact is, not everyone needs to or even should know everything about you. That is not healthy for you or anyone else. Unfortunately, in the past the church has given the impression that if a relationship isn’t moving toward intimacy, then it is failing. That simply isn’t true. (You can read further about that in The Search to Belong by Joe Myers.) Coupled with “authenticity” being one of our generations greatest virtues, the myth that all relationships should be intimate drive us to give more details about ourselves to others than are healthy or profitable.

A few questions to ponder as you wonder what is appropriate to disclose:

Will this be helpful to those who aren’t quite as far along in the journey of life as I am?
Is this going to be something that I regret or am ashamed of?
What is my motivation for talking about this? Am I simply venting or vomiting?
Am I talking about this struggle because it has become part of my identity?
Should I share this with trusted friends first?

Do I want to revert back to a state of peer-plasticity? No, of course not. In the church community at large I want to be as honest as I can allowing that it is beneficial to myself and to others. There are no cut and dry rules for this. It takes maturity and wisdom to understand when your authenticity is helpful, and when it is not. Many frustrations and feelings I reserve for those few who know me the best so they can lovingly guide, support, and even correct me. The wisdom of course comes in knowing the difference between what is healthy and beneficial and what is not.

This is a wisdom that we learn in community. What this means of course is that we will get to practice forbearing with people who have overstepped what is healthy and profitable in terms of genuineness and allowing others to do likewise for our own misjudgment.

[The truth is, it is possible to be authentic, or true to myself in the church community without being a distraction or a hindrance to other people. And so this article is a response not so much to the pull to be authentic, but to the misunderstanding and misappropriation of the act itself.]

2011 - Pt. 1

2011-08-10T10:38:00.000-07:00

The first half of 2011 has been better than I could have imagined. This year I feel like I've accomplished some things that I've been pursuing for a long time. I feel like I have reaped the rewards that come with discipline as well as have experienced some things I can only attribute to the grace of a good and loving God.

First, Kelli and I have recently found out that we will be having our second child in late March of 2012. (if you're offended that you found out about this on my blog and not from my mouth, all I can do is preemptively apologize!). I am very excited to have another kid and see how he/she contrasts with Gram. Everyone says this, but I cannot even IMAGINE what having a second child will be like in terms of love. How can I possibly love another child as much as I love Gram. He's been one of the greatest blessings in my life. Everyone says that the second will feel the same. I will trust their opinion. :)

Second, I was blessed to receive a full year of tuition thanks to the Marvin O. Johnson Educational Ministry Scholarship as I begin the Th.M program at Western Seminary. I received my M.Div at Western and am going back to start some post-graduate work to experience and devote myself to some more research oriented work surrounding historical theology. I feel incredibly thankful and blessed to have received this honor and look forward to working hard in the program. This fall I'll be focusing on Augustine as well as the New Perspective on Paul/Canon.

Third, I've lost 25 lbs. this year, most of it coming off in April-June. This is something I've been vowing to do for the last several years. Since college I have had little discipline in terms of eating and exercising. In high school I was an athlete and everything came easy. After college, I started to put on some weight and exercise became miserable (no doubt thanks to the regular 1am Dominos pizza + unlimited soda). This year Kelli and I have drastically changed our diet (much thanks to our wonderful doctor: Maureen Mays). It wasn't a fad diet and it wasn't unhealthy. We simply removed sugar from our diet and started eating smaller, healthier portions. (I have a copy of the menu if you want it). Running and playing basketball feel about 50x easier now that the weight is off. I went from barely being able to run a mile, to running 3 miles after three times out. I feel great. Related to that, my Triglycerides are below normal (131) for the first time, possibly in my entire life (hard to say). This is something genetic that has plagued my family for generations and it feels good to catch it early and start to change the pattern. If you're name has a "Bagby" in it and you're reading this, it would be wise to get yours checked out!

Fourth, I'm thankful for fantastic friends. While I have felt incredibly blessed and victorious in certain areas, it has also been a year marked by new challenges, experiences, and difficulties. In light of that, I'm not sure what I'd do without such a supportive wife (a better pastor's wife I cannot even imagine!), some very close friends, and a wonderful home community. In the last few years I have learned the value of choosing the right partner for a life of ministry. If you are single and pursuing pastoral ministry of any kind, one of the most important decisions you will make is who you marry (assuming you are pursuing marriage)! I might write more on this later.

Fifth, Kelli's parents, who are both retired, have decided to spend a good part of the year in Portland. I know that many couples have in-law conflicts and such but I am blessed to have a generous, thoughtful, and loving family that I've been welcomed into. I look forward to Mike and Lisa sharing life with us (and I know Gram does too!).

Honestly, this has been a fantastic year. I am learning, growing, and changing. And while it is clear that I have a lot of room to grow and I'm becoming aware of some of my deficiencies, I'm thankful for where God has brought me in my life.

I've also realized recently that ALL of this could change in an instant and so I do not want to take any of this for granted. I look forward to Pt. 2 of 2011 with optimism, but more, a trust that no matter what happens, God is with us.

Doc Henderson

2011-07-07T10:28:00.001-07:00

Dr. Marion Henderson (known by his students as Doc Henderson) was one of my professors in my undergrad at Lincoln Christian University. He taught the Gospels, my fifth semester Greek class, and Revelation. During my college years (1998-2002), Doc was already well along in years and had apparently been teaching since the mid 1800's or something like that, but he was still going strong. I remember he usually (if not exclusively) read from the gospels in his class and at chapel from the Greek text. (Something that I will probably never be able to do). Not having been around my alma mater for almost 10 years, I have since wondered what Doc is up to. Any other LCU grad knows that Doc's greatest desire in life was to hear the words "Well done, good and faithful servant" at the end of his life. So when I heard what he is doing now, I shouldn't have been surprised.

Recently a friend of mine (Josh Peigh) heard news that Doc Henderson is now in a nursing home. Anyone who has transitioned an elderly grandmother or grandfather to a nursing home knows how painful and difficult it is for everyone involved. To live your entire life as an adult, having your own home, possessions, and independence, and then having it all taken away from you is something I cannot imagine. In fact, it seems that many people simply cannot bear it. It's a painful parting with the only way of life they have known and can lead to bitterness, an obsession with the "good ol' days", and little focus on the life that lie ahead.

So naturally, I wondered how Doc Henderson would take it. Josh texted me last night about what Doc is doing in his nursing home: he's teaching the gospels to the other residents! While most people have given up on a meaningful future at this point and prefer to focus on the past, he still believes that the ministry God has given him is not over! I am amazed and inspired by this wonderful man. I hope that I am half the follower of Jesus that Doc Henderson is if I make it to my 90's!

A Word on Sleep (Via 1885)

2011-07-06T14:24:00.000-07:00

"A person should never be waked except in cases of urgent necessity. When a man falls asleep he is in a shape for repairs. All the intricate machinery of his body is being overhauled and put into order for next day's work. Nature knows what the tired body needs. She lays it on the bed, surrounds it with the refreshing air of night, covers it with darkness and lets the man rest. "Tired nature's sweet restorer, balmy sleep," visits him, and as the hours pass by his energies are renewed, his strength comes back, and when the daylight steals through the window, he opens his eyes and feels like a new man. If he is early to bed, he awakes correspondingly early. Now, who will go to that man's side an hour before he opens his eyes and say to nature: "Stand aside and let him get up; he has had enough rest!" Nature will say: "You can take him, if you will, but I will charge him with an hour's loss of sleep, and I'll collect out of his bones and nerves, and hair and eyesight. You can't cheat me, I'll find property to levy on." Nature is the best book-keeper in the world. You may over-draw, but you must pay back, even to the pound of flesh."

Courtesy of "Northern Messenger" October 15th, 1885

A Key Problem For Universalism

2011-06-08T11:26:00.000-07:00

If all people are recipients of the justification that Christ's death merits (as Rom. 5:18-19 is used by universalists to suggest), then where are the current fruits of that salvation in the lives of all? Is salvation simply something to be experienced or received in the future?

I hear universalists say things like, "all people are saved, they just don't know it yet". But that would imply that being "saved" has no implications, benefits, or tangible results in the present lives of those who are saved (but don't know it). This makes what happens in salvation very transactional and lifeless. Essentially, we've got a ticket to heaven, we're on the list, even though we don't know or understand why we're on the list, and as a result, it means relatively nothing in the here and now.

Further, how does one enter God's realm when ones whole life has been lived in rebellion toward God coupled with the lack of the heart transformation that Jesus suggests is crucial to truly experience the Kingdom of God (both presently and post-mortem)?

To me the proponents of universalism (even of the evangelical flavor) have a one-dimensional gospel that is about getting into heaven when or after you die. Ironically, I thought we've (the church) started to understand that the gospel is much more holistic than that. It at least appears to me that universalism is taking a step backwards into an outdated, transactional soteriology that really doesn't change anything until we enter the realm of eternity. Bummer.

What are you doing for Easter?

2011-04-21T18:37:00.000-07:00

This is a question that I get asked every year, from those inside and outside of the church that I pastor. "What are we doing for Easter?" I always want to reply, "I was thinking we would worship the risen Lord. It seems appropriate on this day."

But what people really want to know is, "What kind of fireworks are we going to be setting off?" "Are we giving away a car?" "Are we paying people 10 dollars to come to our service?" "Is anyone going to be rolling in with a tank?" Or simply fill in the blank with any gimmicky attempt that you've heard churches try to get people in the doors since apparently a risen Savior and new life just isn't drawing people anymore.

And unfortunately as a pastor, you FEEL this kind of pressure. I'd like to be able to prepare a sermon like I normally do, with prayer and study and reflection. But you can't help but feel the pressure (possibly imagined) that people are expecting something BIG, even in your sermon. And so there's added stress to write a GREAT sermon. The biggest problem is, I'm not the one who decides which sermons are "good" and which sermons aren't! Typically, most of the ones I think turned out mediocre, God uses in a powerful way. Dallas Willard says that the most important thing that happens in a sermon is what God does with the words after they leave your lips and before they reach the listeners ears. I think that's a powerful thought and makes "trying harder" on a sermon because it's Easter seem kind of silly.

I like to follow up the question "What are we doing for Easter?" with, "What would you like to see us do?" The answer is always the same, "Uh, i don't know."

The impulse that that Easter service should be special is natural seeing that it is the biggest redemptive event in the Christian story. I understand that. But HOW should it be special? Should we have lots of "special" music? Should we have videos and laser light shows? What do people want? I really don't know.

But what I want to suggest is that if you want the Easter service to be special, come ready and prepared to worship the God who gave his life for you and then conquered death so that we may have new life. If you've participated in dying to yourself during Lent for the past 40 days and come prepared to engage in worship with your entire self as you "come to life to the reality of God", you can expect a special Easter service.

In light of that, I am rejecting the outside and imagined pressure to do something BIG. Because honestly, until I can think of how I can do something bigger than what Jesus did on Easter, any attempt to do something BIG is going to look pretty pathetic by comparison.

Summer Reading 2011

2011-04-18T20:59:00.000-07:00

Never too early to start that summer reading list, right?

What's on yours?

Bright's Passage - Josh Ritter

The Pale King - David Foster Wallace

The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier & Clay - Michael Chabon

A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius - Dave Eggers

The Beach - Alex Garland

Martin Eden - Jack London

Fight Club - Chuck Palahniuk

The Border Trilogy - Cormac McCarthy

Here I Stand; A Life of Martin Luther - Roland Bainton

Finding Our Way; Leadership for Uncertain Times -Margaret Wheatley

Failure of Nerve; Leadership in the Age of the Quick Fix - Edwin Friedman

The Truth Shall Make You Odd - Frank Honeycutt

Florida

2011-04-17T11:47:00.000-07:00

My vacation in Florida is over. :(

We realized early on in the trip just how much has happened in our lives in this place.

In college, some college buddies and I drove down to Clearwater three of the four years for spring break. This was my first venture to Florida. Jon Hentrich knew a youth pastor who let us sleep in the basement of their church building making it rather affordable. In this church building we also staged a very late night mock church service that we regrettably recorded and would probably get us all fired at most churches. That video still exists somewhere. :)

My senior year of college I spent 6 months in a preaching internship at Journey Church in Tampa. It was a very memorable and formative time in my life. A month later, Kelli, who was just a college acquaintance at the time moved to Tampa to take a job with Impact Ministries and pursue her MBA . Little did we know 5 years later we would be getting married in St. Petersburg and spending our first year of marriage in Tampa working for Journey and Impact at the University of South Florida.

All that to say, we have a lot of history in Florida and it was nice to be back and remember so many of them.

Some of the highlights of this trip (in no particular order):

1. Gram swimming (and pretty much doing anything else). The longer he is here, the more comfortable he becomes in water. For whatever reason, he doesn't care for the beach or the sand, but loves the pool. He also got to take his first trip to the aquarium where he spent more time walking up and down the stairs than looking at fish. Maybe next year...

2. Rum Runners. When you find a good rum runner, you plant yourself for a while. This is an amazing beachside drink that is hard to overestimate. Light rum, dark rum, blackberry brandy, banana liquor, orange juice, pineapple juice, grenadine, and a cherry. Are you sold?

3. Celebrating Kelli's birthday at Shor restaurant. King Crab Legs, Red Snapper, Grouper, Wine, dessert, scotch....mmmmm. A bit of a splurge that we’ll pay off someday. Well worth it.

4. Tampa Bay Rays vs. Minnesota Twins. John Volstedt has a friend that works for the Rays and was able to hook Kelli and I up with a few free tickets. Out of respect to my friend Rob Grant, I was rooting for the Twins, but Johnny Damon hit a walk-off in the bottom of the ninth that ruined Rob's day.

5. Hanging with Adam Randall at the Dunedin House of Beer. Good to catch up with Adam and experience a good Florida beer bar. 40 taps of mostly east-coast microbrews. Adam is also one of my most talented friends and a great musician. Click here and listen to "Hope is Your Last Visitor" and "Bodies and Souls".

6. Visiting Journey Church. This was the church that I did a 6 month preaching internship in. At the time we were meeting at Gaither High School, but in the last few years they built a building which we got to see for the first time. There are still many people there that we've known for years and who we love greatly. I am always struck when we go back and visit how little time seems to have passed even though it has been 5 years. There's some good people at Journey. How do I know? Because they heard some pretty lousy sermons but encouraged me nonetheless!

7. Knowing that capable and gifted Evergreeners were coordinating and leading the gathering at Hawthorne in my absence! I hope they did good, but not TOO good. :)

8. Getting to do some pleasure reading. More specifically, Douglas Coupland's Generation X, Michael Chabon's Manhood for Amateurs, and Jack London's The Road. One day I even came up with a summer reading list that I'll post soon.

9. Moe's. This is a burrito place that actually had a location in Beaverton for a very short stint, but for some reason Beaverton folks don't know what's up, so it closed. The sour cream flows like cheap wine and the sweet tea....oh the sweet tea.

10. The Sun. It was about 85 and sunny EVERY DAY we were here. Amazing. I almost forgot what it was like to have that many sunny days in a row!

Back to Portland....

Odds and Ends 7

2011-04-09T19:34:00.000-07:00

In less than 40 hours we will be sitting on the beach in Clearwater, FL soaking up some sun for an entire week. I plan on leaving my iphone off, no computer, no distractions from vacation. So if you're waiting for a return phone call or email, you won't get it! :) See ya when I get home.

To gear up for our vacation (and celebrate Devin's upcoming 30th Birthday), we (Kelli, Gram, and myself) spend a lovely evening up at a condo on Mt. Hood with the Vaughns. Nothing like sitting outside in the hot tub while it's snowing! I suppose it would have been more romantic if the one I was with would have been my wife rather than Devin, but win some, lose some. We were expecting Gram to go into "vacation sleep mode" which is when he wakes up screaming every 1 1/2 hours, but he slept extra-ordinarily well, which I hope is a good sign for next week in FL.

Speaking of Mt. Hood, we ate at the Ice Axe Grill in Government Camp and sampled all of their beers and I've got to say that I was impressed! I appreciate the fact that they were all beers in the 5% range. I'm tired of only seeing beers on tap at Portland establishments that are 6, 7, or even 10% alcohol. I want to enjoy a beer and relax with friends, not feel like going to sleep at 7:30pm. As Mark Sherwood wisely pointed out (as a fellow home brewer), it's much tougher to create a beer that tastes just as good at 5% as it would at 7%. That's very true!

See ya in a week!

Odds and Ends 6 - Good News Edition

2011-04-07T10:38:00.000-07:00

-My home group is amazing. Had a great night last night eating fried chicken, collared greens, mashed potatoes, sweet tea, drinking some home brew created specifically for our group, and even playing Goldeneye on N64. It's not just about what we do though, but about the quality of people in the group. Fantastic people!

-I'm honored to have been asked last night to marry Steve and Krista this September at Timberline Lodge! Should be a great time!

-Excited for my friend Chris Leonardo who got the job he wanted yesterday! Congrats!

-While I'm bummed that Clay and Emily are moving, I'm excited to hear that they're having a boy! What is a Clay Jr. going to be like? :)

-Just three days until we leave for sunny, hot Florida for a week. What better way to prepare for that than to go to Mt. Hood for a few days in the snow?

Odds and Ends 5

2011-04-06T11:51:00.001-07:00

My Twitter/Facebook fast for Lent continues and so does my outlet for random facts, quotes, and links.

This quote from the Ecclesia Gathering in D.C. really struck me: "Maturity is willing to take responsibility for your own emotional being and destiny." - Mary Kate Morse

Another one was from Todd Hunter who was quoting Dallas Willard: "There is no 'you' apart from your present life."

Marc Cortez gives us 5 Reasons You Should Study Karl Barth. Very convincing. :)

Here are 40 statements made by Nietzsche that will ruin your day. One of them however relates to the series we're currently doing through the Sermon on the Mount. "The Kingdom of Heaven is a condition of the heart — not something that comes upon the earth or after death." What do you think?

Finally, here are famous world ideologies as explained in reference to cows. Love it.

Odds and Ends 4

2011-04-05T10:37:00.000-07:00

Apparently we had 29 days of rain in March here in Portland. Does that mean the rain-purgatory will end early and we will have a beautiful April?

Looking forward to being on the beach in Florida next week. Excited to see some friends. Especially looking forward to burying Gram in the sand. And sitting with my wife, drinking a rum runner while Kelli's parents watch him. :)

Bummed that Clay and Emily Reed will be moving to Connecticut. Losing a good friend and a brew buddy to the east coast. Will also never forget the 10 mile Rock of Ages hike we did together (what I refer to as hell). I was however excited to get to take him to the Horse Brass Pub for the FIRST TIME last Friday night. How many years have they been here? 3?

I'm excited for how the Palm Sunday service is coming together at Hawthorne. Aubrey Peth, Steve Strand, Brandon Johnson, and Chris Schepman (and probably some others) have been planning and will lead it that morning. Can't wait to hear how it goes!

Finally, an update about O'Bagby Brewery (my house), my Saison is taking FOREVER. I was hoping it would be done by Easter, but doesn't look like it. In better news, Clay and I brewed a Munich Dunkel (dark german lager) in January that is just now ready to drink and it is GOOD! Let me know if you'd like to try it (although supplies are very limited).

Odds and Ends Pt. 3

2011-04-04T08:50:00.000-07:00

First of all, I am about to win my NCAA bracket pool for the first time ever. It's like a weight has been lifted. Also, thanks to my friend Doug Blocksma that means I will win a fantastic seasonal beer from Odell Brewing in Ft. Collins. Woohoo!

Second, Marc Cortez linked an interesting article on some myths that surround the Crusades. Seems that conversations about the crusades are being reinvigorated, no doubt due to the increasing tensions surrounding current Muslim/Christian affairs. Rodney Stark recently wrote a book on the subject as well that's i'd like to make time to read.

Third, we are finishing up the Sermon on the Mount at Evergreen this upcoming Sunday. Jesus' most famous teaching has an interesting arc beginning with a wide-invitation into the Kingdom and moving increasingly toward the challenge of discipleship. This last Sunday is TOUGH stuff but it makes sense in light of Jesus contrasting the superficial, external religious righteousness that leads to our own destruction and the kingdom, generative righteousness that leads to full life. The entire sermon really hinges on Matt. 5:17-20. In light of that, and all of the illustrations Jesus used to make that contrast, Matt. 7:13-29 makes total sense.

Odds and Ends Pt. 2

2011-04-01T10:07:00.000-07:00

The Twitter/Facebook fast continues and it's been a nice break. It's a freeing thing not to read and clutter my mind with the thoughts and problems of 600 people, many of which I don't even really know.

First of all, it was fun to watch Cubs opening day with my little bro (regardless of the result). I'm under no delusions that the Cubs will have a good year. I'm thankful we're in such a weak division though where they won't look quite AS bad as they could in another division. The Cubs are not good, but why can't they beat the Pirates?

Second, I'm beginning to think it's impossible to restore a weed-filled lawn. Weed and Feed? Fertilizer plus Crab Grass Preventer? They might as well have me sprinkle rice on my lawn, it would be just as effective. I'm beginning to think Scott's products are the biggest racket ever invented.

Third, related to this; home-ownership is an anxiety-ridden, expensive, and frustrating venture. Don't get me wrong, I'm thankful to have a place that is "ours" (Bank of America's to be precise), but the problems and the ants and the lawn and all 6 million things that can go wrong can drive a person nuts.

And finally, life is feeling pretty good right now. Regardless of circumstances and the normal and not so-normal pressures and pains of ministry, I feel very content, happy, and satisfied with life. I'm sleeping well at night, enjoying the time I have with Kelli and Gram and am excited for this summer. Lots of great stuff happening !

I'm always tempted to say, "there's a lot of change going on", but isn't the nature of life change? Isn't death the only thing that stops change (maybe?)? Why are we surprised that there is always change happening? A better question perhaps is, what does "stability" look like, or feel like amidst the constant change? Where do we find our center?

Circumstantial stability never lasts long and isn't something to always be sought in life in the way of Jesus anyway. However, some people choose the other track, trying to avoid any feeling of stability, or not understanding what a life looks like that has stability. Instead they seem to thrive (not in a good way) on chaos and drama. But unhealthy boundaries and stretching yourself to exhaustion isn't a long-term answer either. Nor is introducing new drama into your life by making bad and unwise decisions. I can sense a longer, more thought out post coming on this, but I'm going to leave it for now and let it marinate longer.

Odds and Ends

2011-03-25T18:01:00.000-07:00

Since I've given up Facebook and Twitter for Lent I've had no outlet for the random, relatively worthless 140 character thoughts that come my way. So here's some random stuff for ya.

First, George Marsden's Biography Jonathan Edwards; A Life is fantastic! No matter where you land with Edwards, if you love a good biography, you'll love this.

Second, I made an Amber Ale recently for our home group that turned out wonderful. It's got a nice sweet, honey finish and fruity Simcoe hop aroma. We're in for a good spring woodstock home community!

Third, I had a wonderful day with my little guy. He continues to be an incredible blessing, even in the difficult moments. I love him and his huge personality so much.

Fourth, it was good to see "Jimmer" and BYU lose. He can chuck a 3 with the best of them, unfortunately that's about all the team has. I'm glad I don't have to hear the announcers verbally make love to him in any more games.

Finally, if you want to see an uncomfortable interview, don't miss the MSNBC interview with Rob Bell. Fascinating that an MSNBC reporter can tear apart a book with a simple read, it's hard to believe Christians who plant themselves in the scriptures can't easily see through it as well. But I suppose if you want to believe something bad enough, you'll do whatever it takes. Kevin Deyoung also has a lengthy, thorough, and overwhelmingly convincing critique here.

As an aside, I'm not a Rob Bell hater by any means. I thought his book Sex God was really good and I love a lot of his Nooma videos.

The Church we have.

2011-03-15T14:25:00.000-07:00

“God does not work apart from sinful and flawed (forgiven to be sure) men and women who are mostly without credentials. Romantic, crusader, and consumer representations of the church get in the way of recognizing the church for what it actually is. If we permit-or worse, promote-dreamy or deceptive distortions of the Holy spirit creation, we interfere with participation in the real thing. The church we want becomes the enemy of the church we have. It is significant that there is not a single instance in the biblical revelation of a congregation of God’s people given to us in romantic, crusader, or consumer terms. There are no “successful” congregations in Scripture or in the history of the church.” Eugene Peterson

Some reflections on preaching...

2010-12-20T13:27:00.000-08:00

I've been thinking about preaching today, mostly as a response to being dissatisfied with my own right now. I listened to a recent sermon from a college preaching professor of mine, J.K. Jones who is truly a master at the craft, but even more important than that, a person of integrity and character that you simply know spends a LOT of time in the presence of God.

What I noticed when listening to J.K. was the tone of joy that encompassed the entire thing. What he clearly wasn't trying to do was clear up every nuance, thought, question that people would have, nor was he trying to do the Holy Spirit's work of convicting. He wasn't seeking to be hard hitting, or impact-ful, so to speak. He told the story, drawing out a few implications through personal experience and examples and it was beautifully done. It engaged the emotions in a non-manipulative, but powerful way.

In any case, when I hear good preaching, it's hard not to contrast it with what I see myself doing. And I had a realization today, that my tone reveals what I think my purpose in preaching is supposed to be. And lately, for some reason I feel like I've been trying to co-opt the work of the Holy Spirit in his work in convicting of sin, or challenging "wrong-thinking", or whatever it may be. My preparation seems to come more out of a place of looking for areas to correct, rather than looking for ways to inspire or build up.

Yesterday, I preached the good news of the new creation and righteous king in Isaiah 11, but I felt like the tone of my sermon was NOT good news of the new creation and righteous king and right after the message was over, I felt regret, and largely felt irresponsible. There was a void in the sermon that was largely induced by the void in my own character and heart. I don't mean this in a dramatic, over-the-top way, but when joy is lacking in the sermon, generally, joy is lacking in the preacher's life. And I regret that deeply. It's not fair to the community. Joyful preaching comes from joyful people. And that's work that God and I have to do together in this next year. Hope should sound like hope!

It's also made me think of some questions for reflection during (or after) the sermon preparation process. Here they are:

Does it encourage imagination and deeper, continued thinking? Or does it shut down conversation and deaden imagination? Does it try to close every door, and answer every objection? Or does it inspire people to take up a thought-journey on their own and with the community?

When it’s over, do people feel like they were kicked in the ass, or feel generally numb? Or do they feel like they have been drawn into a better reality, feeling excited and hopeful about the future?

Is the preaching (tone and content) reinforced by my own character and experience? Or is there a felt-contradiction within myself or others as I speak the words I’ve prepared?

Does it inspire a love and compassion for God and one another? Or does it cause an increased level of guilt and anxiety toward God and one another?

Anyone care to add to these?

Top 10 Beers to Brew in 2011

2010-12-15T12:10:00.000-08:00

Is this self-indulgent? Yes. Isn't that what blogs are for? This is a good chunk of my brew calendar for next year. I'm stoked. If you're nice, maybe you can have some.

1. Belgian Christmas Spice Dark Ale

If you haven't had St. Bernardus Christmas Ale, you haven't lived. I'm thankful for the bottle generously gifted to me by Mark and Emily Sherwood this year. Wonderful! Hoping mine will be 1/4 as good.

2. Saison

A light, spicy beer originally brewed for French farmworkers in the hot summer. No one really knows what an authentic one tastes like, but that leaves a lot of room for experimentation.

3. Bavarian Hefeweizen

Banana and clove. Two of my favorite things in a german wheat beer.

4. Honey Kolsch

Going to try a German Kolsch with a good amount of honey to compliment the fruity yeast.

5. Strong Scotch Ale

Molasses, brown sugar, caramel malt and a lot of time aging in cool temperatures.

6. Belgian Wit

I think i've got the perfect Wit recipe figured out. Lots of oats for smooth creaminess, un-malted wheat berries, Coriander, Orange Peel, and possibly a little lavender.

7. Belgian Strong Golden Ale

This will be Gram's 2nd Birthday Party Beer. The Golden Gram. Takes about 4 months to make, so I'll have to start early.

8. Schwarzbier

The German black lager, one of Kelli's favorites.

9. Winter Spruce Ale

Inspired by Alaskan Winter Ale which is brewed with Spruce tips. Still trying to decide if I want to use a liquid spruce essence or go with the real thing.

10. Coffee Cream Stout

Obviously, this is a regular offering at O'Bagby's Pub.

Books I Most Want to Read in 2011

2010-12-14T10:02:00.001-08:00

Ok, final book post. Big sigh of relief. Nerdfest almost complete. After my last obnoxious rant, I figured I should end on a positive note. So here are the books at the top of my to-read list of next year.

1. The Pastor: A Memoir - Eugene Peterson

I will read anything Peterson writes, and this one is VERY promising.

2. Desiring the Kingdom - James K.A. Smith

Everywhere I turn, someone is reading this book. Must be good. I guess everywhere I turn someone is reading "The Secret" too though. Hmm....

3. Revelation - Gordon Fee

I'm a big Gordon Fee fan, I'm also a big Revelation fan. Not in the crazy Left Behind, John Hagee kind of way, more in the Reversed Thunder, Eugene Peterson kind of way. However, I'm really excited to see what Fee's research has produced.

4. King's Cross - Tim Keller

I've got to get my sermon material for 2011 somewhere, right?

5. Sun of Righteousness; Arise! - Jurgen Moltmann

German theologians are the best! Right?

6. The Truth Shall Make You Odd - Frank Honeycutt

I don't know anything about this book but the subtitle: "Speaking with Pastoral Integrity in Awkward Situations." Sign me up!

7. Life is Mostly Edges: A Memoir - Calvin Miller

Hopefully this will fill my memoir fix for the year.

8. Community and Growth - Jean Vanier

Heard nothing but great things.

9. The Gospel in a Pluralistic Society - Lesslie Newbigin

This is one of those "you haven't read this yet?" kind of books. The shame...oh the shame.

10. God is Not One - Stephen Prothero

I'm intrigued by the premise. Prothero says that we need to stop pretending all religions are the same in the hopes that it will bring us peace or tolerance. He actually suggests that it's this very thing that causes so many problems in our world. If we simply understood and respected the differences, things would go much better for us. Interesting!

7 Books from 2010 that I'll Never Read

2010-12-13T21:11:00.000-08:00

1. The Power - Rhonda Byrne

Laughably dumb. Possibly, the dumbest life philosophy I've ever heard of. That's being generous. Here's a good critique.

2. American By Heart - Sarah Palin

Just being honest, I will probably never read anything by Sarah Palin. She's a great character for SNL spoofs, but that seems to be about it.

3. Pinheads and Patriots - Bill O'Reilly

I think the biggest reason I will never read this book (other than my lack of interest in thoughtless political blabber), is the picture on the front of the book. It's clear that Obama is a pinhead, and he is a patriot. Well done Bill, well done.

4. Kardashian Konfidential

They can't even spell the title right. Can't imagine how many misspellings are in the rest of the book.

5. Justin Bieber: First Step 2 Forever; My Story

I think this will be on almost everyone's list of what not to read in the entire universe. To be brutally honest Justin, if you are thinking that you will be remembered "forever", or that you are a timeless musical genius, you may want to lower your expectations a pinch.

6. Inside of a Dog; What Dogs See, Smell, and Know - Alexandra Horowitz

If there were a 22 minute special on Discovery Channel, I might watch it, but I doubt it. I can't imagine spending 3 hours reading it with all of the other options available. Can we get a short synopsis or something?

7. Chelsea Chelsea Bang Bang - Chelsea Handler

I can't imagine a television personality that I will ever like less. I try to, but I don't know what anyone could do to make me like them less.

Favorites Books Read in 2010 - Pt. 2

2010-12-13T08:46:00.000-08:00

Ok, here comes the general non-fiction/memoir/biography category. That's a category, right?

7. The Unlikely Disciple - Kevin Roose

As a Christian College graduate, this memoir of a semester spent at Liberty University connected all too well. Half of that made me laugh, half of it made me cringe. Overall though, a very generous memoir of the bizarre cultural experience that is "Christian College". Also, very interesting recollections of a close-encounter with Jerry Falwell. Highly recommend.

6. Superfreakonomics - Steven Levitt

This is pure brain candy. I didn't read Freakonomics, so I thought I would be totally lost. :)

5. Outliers - Malcolm Gladwell

Hey, guess what, you're not near as responsible for your success as you think you are, successful people. That's right. Again, I'm the only one left that hadn't read this yet.

4. The Bullpen Gospels - Dirk Hayhurst

A memoir of a minor league baseball season? Why hasn't anyone thought of this yet? I didn't think I could love baseball anymore than I already did. I was wrong.

3. Hannah's Child - Stanley Hauerwas

An emotional and surprising look inside a fascinating theologian's life.

2. Seven Storey Mountain - Thomas Merton

I've loved Thomas Merton for a long time. New Seeds of Contemplation and No Man is an Island are must-reads. But his auto-biography (that he wrote very young) really helped me understand his conversion, the eucharist, and the Catholic faith in a way I never have. Truly a beautiful book.

1. Bonhoeffer - Eric Metaxas

To be honest, I haven't quite finished it yet, but it doesn't really matter. I think what strikes me most about Bonhoeffer in this biography is his courage. Courage to go a direction in life that his family didn't quite understand. Courage to stand up to the Nazi regime in a time when they were trying to control the German Church, even at the cost of his life. Metaxas gives a very detailed look into the life and writings of Bonhoeffer. This is definitely worth your time.

Favorite Books Read in 2010 - Pt. 1

2010-12-11T14:05:00.000-08:00

Unfortunately, List December has simply not happened this year! Making year end lists has always been a favorite part of the year, but I haven't made the time for this to happen. However, I still want to do a few lists, particularly books and music, because those are the most interesting to me. I'm glad to say that having a child hasn't slowed my reading down. I generally read between 50-60 books a year, and this year has been no difference. It's amazing how much you can read by simply reading for 10-20 minutes a day!

So, I suppose we'll start with Spirituality/Ministry/Theology which we'll just clump into one messy category simply out of laziness. We'll get to general non-fiction next. But, let's start the countdown.

20. The Irresistible Revolution - Shane Claiborne

Everyone has read this book but me. Still surprised how many people this book turns into a Pharisee. Seems like people get really judgmental after reading this book making statements like, "they aren't doing anything..." kind of stuff. Weird phenomenon, but can't blame the book. It's a great challenge to live out faith in "radical" ways.

19. Crazy Love - Francis Chan

This book was a real kick in the *#&! to be quite frank. At first his strong language turned me off and it reminded me of something I would have loved in high school. However, the more I read, the more challenged I became and ended up really appreciating his directness.

18. Giving Church Another Chance - Todd Hunter

Todd Hunter presents a good case for, well, giving church another chance. He gets to the heart of the function and benefit of the rhythms of community practice beyond the surface level, "This is boring or monotonous", or the ever popular, "these people aren't perfect so I'm outta here" kind of non-sense.

17. Introverts in the Church - Adam McHugh

What place, or role do introverts have in the life of the church which has been primarily extrovert driven and focused? A unique treatment of this often-not addressed issue of the foreign land that introverts can find themselves in with "church".

16. Wired for Intimacy - William Struthers

Struthers is a neuro-scientiest and a Christ-follwer and explains what effect pornography has on the male-brain. Interesting and disturbing book.

15. Salvation Belongs to Our God - Christopher Wright

A biblical theology of salvation. Fascinated by the holistic, broad implications of salvation through scripture. This is a worthy read for anyone who wants a broader understanding of what it means to "be saved."

14. Sacred Rhythms - Ruth Haley Barton

A great introduction to creating a formative rhythm of life.

13. Women in Ministry - James De Young

A former professor at Western Seminary writes a book that seeks to go beyond egalitarianism and complementarianism and succeeds on several levels. Fantastic background research as he presents a "third way."

12. Sex God - Rob Bell

I was initially skeptical of this book. Rob Bell is just kind of "ok" to me. I think he's a gifted communicator, but I don't find myself wanting to listen to him every week or anything. Plus, I generally hate books that have a "shock-value" type title like this. However, this was a fantastic writing on the spiritual value and place of sex in society. A truly helpful read when thinking through our own sexuality. Loved it.

11. When God is Silent - Barbara Brown Taylor

Great little book on preaching. Disagreed with some of the more "mainline-y" homiletical ideas which I find a little boring, but over-all a fascinating book for anyone who preaches on a regular basis.

10. Imaginary Jesus - Matt Mikilatos

A incredibly fun, quirky read that presents different ideas we have of Jesus through a narrative of a young man trying to sort out the real Jesus from all of the impostors.

9. The Wisdom of Stability - Jonathan Wilson Hartgrove

We discussed this book as a home group. A great challenge (influenced by the desert fathers) to plant, or root yourself in a place for the long term. Also a good critique of our transient, mobile culture.

8. The Great Theologians - Gerald McDermott

McDermott creates a list of who he believes are the most influential theologians of all time. Each chapter has a short bio of the theologian as well as a synopsis of the major contributions of the individual.

7. Untamed - Alan and Deb Hirsch

What does discipleship look like in the missional church? Read this book and find out :)

6. The Homiletical Plot - Eugene Lowry

I was a preaching major, how have I not read this by now? One of the more interesting and compelling approaches to preaching I've read. I'm fairly certain Tim Keller uses this exact format. Speaking of...

5. Generous Justice - Tim Keller

I've accepted that anything Keller writes is going to be fantastic and I'm going to want to steal every word he says for sermons. Yes, shame on me. But also, shame on him for writing (and preaching) such great stuff. Another winner here.

4. The Pursuit of God - A.W. Tozer

Always spoken of as a classic, and I can see why. Truly timeless.

3. Calling and Character - Will Willimon

What can I say? I love Bill Bill.

2. Resident Aliens - Stanley Hauerwas and Will Willimon

Bill Bill with Hauerwas? Even better. After reading this book, my thinking on our approach to culture was completely changed. (for the better I hope).

1. The Contemplative Pastor - Eugene Peterson

Not one has had a greater influence on the way I think of what it means to be a pastor. This book is no exception. If you're a pastor and have not read it (or Under the Unpredictable Plant, and Shaping the Angles), please stop what you're doing and read it right now. I wish these were required reading for every pastor in America. Can we make that happen?

Practice Resurrection 1

2010-12-10T10:59:00.000-08:00

“Obviously, the church is not an ideal community that everyone takes on look at and asks, “How do I get in?” So what’s left?

What’s left is this: we look at what has been given to us in our Scriptures and in Jesus and try to understand why we have a church in the first place, what the church, as it is given to us, is. We are not a utopian community. We are not God’s avenging angels. I want to look at what we have, what the church is right now, and ask, Do you think that maybe this is exactly what God intended when he created the church? Maybe the church as we have it provides the very conditions and proper company congenial for growing up in Christ, for becoming mature, for arriving at the measure of the stature of Christ. Maybe God knows what he is doing, giving us church, this church.” Pg. 14

We complain about the church A LOT! And for good reason. I think we can all acknowledge that there are some goofy, hurtful, and ridiculous things that happen in the church. And for some of us, this is simply too much to take and so we leave. We make statements like, "this isn't what God intended the church to be."

Peterson raises an interesting question however: If we actually experienced the ideal church that we have in our head, where the people that are present are of our choosing, there are no relational disputes, and no brokenness, no mistakes, nothing that makes our stomachs churn, etc., would it be possible to grow and mature? Or do the conditions for growth and maturity in Christ require the conditions, challenges, and brokenness that we experience in the church? That's a valid question.

He goes on to state later in the chapter:

Cowardly Church Signs

2010-09-21T15:46:00.000-07:00

This afternoon as I was driving home in my neighborhood I saw a church sign that had been freshly changed. I'm used to this particular church co-opting whatever message happens to be popular in our city at the time. For the longest time now it's been: "Reduce, Reuse, Recycle." I'm all for recycling, but this seems pretty desperate. "Please like me, PLEASE???"

I wish we could get rid of church signs altogether, or at least simply have our service information available and not feel like we have to preach to the people that don't want to come and hear us preach on Sunday. Why can't churches find the balance between saying nothing and is cowardly (i.e. as seen above), and saying WAY too much and is inappropriate ("Where will you be spending eternity? Smoking or non-smoking?)

The church's latest message, no doubt in response to Terry Jones' media perpetuated sham in threatening to burn the Quran, is "One God, Many Faiths". And this sign made me wonder, at what point did this particular church simply stop believing anything, or to say it inversely, when did they start believing in nothing?

The statement "One God, Many Faiths" ignores the obvious and apparent contradictions between what these "many faiths" believe and proclaim. It's tough to get around and I've never heard anyone do it in a way that doesn't insult basic human intelligence. Can all of these faiths be describing or seeking to describe the same God? Is there a difference between resurrection and reincarnation? Is suffering really an illusion, or is suffering the real pain that Christ experienced on the cross? Does Jesus show us who God is? Or is he simply a prophet? Can we with any kind of integrity or intellect make a statement like, "One God, Many Faiths" when there are a limitless number of contradictions?

To me it's more than embarrassing to make a statement like this, it seems intentionally and intellectually dishonest and intended to give an aura of enlightenment or tolerance of some kind by essentially making the statement that "we believe in everything!" In fact, I think if you believe in everything, you really believe in nothing. Let's see you get that one by a freshmen philosophy class :)

Frequent push-back to any kind of exclusive claim is, "It's arrogant to claim your perception of God, or your scriptures' perception is the only way." But isn't it just as arrogant to claim that everyone's perception of God is right? After all, both are exclusive claims in the sense that you're both purporting to view reality accurately, right?

So there really IS no difference between the two in regard to believing you have an objective view of reality. One individual absolutely believes ALL ways are right, another simply believes ONE way is right. Both a claim that they are right, and other people are wrong. If you want to call that arrogant...okay. The big difference between the two approaches is that at least if you claim ONE way (whether that is Islam, Judaism, or Jesus) you're not being intellectually dishonest or making claims that are logically impossible (i.e. the "many faiths" approach).

Or perhaps, maybe they are honestly choosing to believe that in light of the complexity of the world, there is no possibility for anyone to know anything true about God? But if that is the case, haven't they ceased to be "the church"? Why not just hang it up?

Honestly, I think the church may simply have a desire to be liked and accepted in society (a priority they put above truth or making any absolute claims), even if that means saying a bunch of nothing on their church signs that people would just as likely see on Oprah or on Sesame Street. To me that smacks of desperation and lacks any sense of mission, unless the mission is a bait-and-switch where people come in and hear what the church "really thinks." But I doubt that is the case.

Neil Cole on the parable of the soils

2010-08-03T11:19:00.001-07:00

Speaking of the parable of the soils from Math. 13:

“I have now come to expect two-thirds of those who accept the message of the Kingdom to fizzle out and not bear fruit. This has given me hope. Why? Because I no longer feel responsible for the fruit, or lack thereof, in the lives of disciples. If ten people accept the Gospel and only two bear fruit, I no longer babysit the unfruitful eight. Instead, I invest my life in the two. These two will be much fruit.

I am convinced that we have made a serious mistake by accommodating bad soil in our churches. When we see people come to Christ and then slip away, we assume a responsibility that is not ours. We would not take it on if we truly listened to this parable. We assume that we must be doing something wrong if so many people fall away from following Christ. We then doubt our ministry efforts and search for other ways to keep people. The results are often devastating to the local church.

Because we think that the number of people is a sure sign of fruitfulness and success, we do everything we can to keep people. We try to woo people to come and keep coming. What we end up with is an audience of consumers shopping for the best “services.” We cater to this sort of thinking by trying to compete with other churches with a better show.

We compromise the life of the church if we keep bad soil in our membership. We make church a show that requires the audience to make little or no effort. If someone is willing to come to our service once a week for a little more than an hour and sit passively watching others do the work, then they are considered members in good standing, no matter what the rest of their week is like. One can be totally uncommitted to the Kingdom, distracted by the deceitfulness of riches and the desire for other things, and still be a member.

Our churches are full of bad, unfruitful soil. A common refrain of pastors is that 80 percent of the work in church is done by 20 percent of the people. Reread this parable and you will understand why.

We must invest everything in the few who will bear fruit. Life is too short and the potential yields are too great to spend our lives babysitting fruitless people. This paradigm shift will change the way you do ministry. We must regain the lost art of wiping the dust (bad soil) off our feet. We might consider such a thing unloving, but this is what Jesus did. Perhaps it is indeed the most loving thing we can do. People must be confronted by the consequences of their choices if they are to get to the heart of their need for Christ. To do otherwise is not more loving; it is cruel, selfish, and counterproductive.

Jesus is the Good Shepherd who lays His life down for the sheep. He will leave the ninety-nine in search of the one lamb who is lost. Nevertheless, He would never force himself upon those who are not interested, nor cater His message and ministry to trying to hold on to those who are more interested in other things. Although most churches today would be enamored if a young and wealthy leader came seeking salvation, Jesus was not. He gave the man some things to chew on and sent him on his way dejected. The Scripture points out specifically that Jesus really loved the man. In other words, this was the most loving thing he could offer the man (Mk. 10).

I have always been amazed at what can happen when we simply plant the good seed of God’s Word in the good soil of broken people. We have an expression in our movement: bad people make good soil-there’s a lot of fertilizer in their lives.” Pg. 68-72

Create the Community You Want to See!

2010-07-28T11:37:00.000-07:00

“If you warm to this vision of Christian community, then start where you are. Sell the vision by modeling the vision. Don’t become a pain to your existing congregation, telling them everything they are doing is wrong. Become a blessing by offering hospitality, showing practical care, dropping in on people. Create around you a group of Christians who will share their lives and encourage one another in the faith. You might start with your home group. Often home groups are little more than meetings. Make yours a community by acting like a community. You don’t have to mount a campaign for change-just get on with it and make community infectious. Create something that other people want to be part of. And think about whether you could establish a context in which people in your church can hang out together and invite unbelieving friends-something like a regular cafe night, an open home, or sports practice.”

Tim Chester from "Total Church"

Great advice in an age where there are more cynics/critics/consumers than creators!

On Pastors and Giving

2010-07-14T11:25:00.000-07:00

“Those clergy who justify their financial irresponsibility by saying, “I do not need to give money to the church because I give so much in so many other ways,” are not only deceiving themselves, but they are also presenting a horrible example to their congregations. Our giving to the church and its work ought to be exemplary in its effusiveness. We thereby not only demonstrate Christian stewardship in a society that encourages greed, but we also witness to the possibility that our lives and our possessions are not our own.” Will Willimon

As you can see, I'm on a real Willimon kick here. I've even started to joke that if it weren't for Wesley's idea of Christian perfectionism, I may even become a Methodist! In any case, this quote strikes close to home, because ashamedly, I will confess that the first three years of ministry in New York City my giving was horrendous! I'm actually quite embarrassed by it now and I feel like not only did I lack the maturity to understand giving, but also excused myself from it for the exact reason that Willimon points out: I'm already giving SO much to the church.

But I have since learned that pastors certainly aren't exempt from giving financially, but should model generosity to the people God has placed in our care. Whether ordained or not, giving has everything to do with worshiping Jesus with our resources, being formed by the Spirit by letting go of money (that is God's anyway), and keeping money from gripping my life in such a way so that I serve it over God. And hopefully, all three of those things are something you can count on a Christ-follower (and pastor) to be intentional about!

I've also realized that one thing that kept me from regularly giving as a pastor, really just had to do with my own lack of character at the time. I excused it because of my service to the church (which is a bad excuse), or because I was underpaid (an even worse reason to short-change God), and I didn't even have the character to be ABLE to give well (which is a shame considering the unique calling of ministry). I also realize now that I was knowingly or unknowingly to my congregants, a terrible example. Why would people give to a church, when the pastors didn't even believe in it enough to give?

You may feel that I'm being hard on myself, but I am simply being honest with myself as I've seen this as a growth area over the past 8 years. I'm thankful that I have such a disciplined and virtuous wife as to help teach me the importance and worship of giving!

Why We Meet on Sunday.

2010-07-13T11:51:00.000-07:00

“Sunday is the key that explains to the world and to the church why we are the church. In our Sunday worship Christians serve the world by showing the world that God has not left us alone and that we have good work to do. Our work is worship. Worship is the work God does with us to show the world a manner of life that could not be known had not God vindicated Jesus in the resurrection. Sabbath is a weekly reminder that we are created for no better purpose than to praise God and enjoy God forever.

In simply withdrawing from what the world considers its “important business,” in taking time to do nothing but worship in a world at war, in celebrating an “order of worship” in a world of chaos, Christians are making a most “political” statement. It takes courage to take time to worship God in a world where we are constantly told that it is up to us to do right, or right won’t be done. Sunday is that holy time when Christians perform one of our most radical, countercultural, peculiarly defining acts-we simply refuse to show up for work. Sabbath is how we put the world in it’s place. This is how we take over the world's time and help to make it God’s time. It’s how we get over our amnesia and recover our memory of how we got here, and who we are, and in whose service we are called.”

Will Willimon from Calling and Character

Pastoral Wisdom

2010-07-09T11:25:00.001-07:00

“There are many times in the pastoral ministry when we see no visible results of our efforts, have no sense that people are getting better because of our work among them, have little proof of our effectiveness as priests. In those moments, our only hope is to cling to our vocation, to adhere to the sense that God has called us, rather than we ourselves, that God has a plan and purpose for how our meager efforts fit into God’s larger scheme of things. God’s vocation is the only ultimate validation of our ministry.”

Will Willimon (Calling and Character)

Are you "making a difference"?

2010-07-05T10:06:00.000-07:00

“There is no substitution for learning to be a Christian by being in the presence of significant lives made significant by being Christian. Significance can of course be a misleading description of the lives that got my attention. Significance suggests importance. it suggests lives that make a difference and that demand acknowledgment. But the lives of significance I began to notice were not significant in any of those ways. Rather, they were lives of quiet serenity, capable of attending with love to the everyday without the need to be recognized as “making a difference.” (Pg. 95-96 of Hannah's Child)

What a great description of significance! So many of us (myself included) get frustrated because we carry with us the idea that to be significant is to be "recognized as making a difference." To see a visible, tangible difference being made. On a pastoral note, let me just say that this can be excruciating! There are stretches when it feels as if you're trying SO hard, and working your butt off, but simply don't see the kind of difference that would affirm that you're actually doing something significant.

Many times though, as we begin to ask, "what might this look like for us?"; for some reason we compare ourselves to those we would define as doing the "most significant" work in our country or world. So, we read a book like Irresistible Revolution and think, "unless I'm doing something as significant as Shane Claiborne, then I'm really not doing anything at all."

I've seen people fizzle out of community on account of this very belief. It happens from time to time when people simply don't feel like they're contributing anything significant because they don't see the evidence of a discernible difference (usually defined by over-idealistic expectations). What results is a nagging frustration. But instead of adjusting expectations, or simply describing significance with humility in the way of Jesus, blame is placed.

It's the pastors fault, he's not challenging us enough. It's the community's fault, they're just not "doing anything". It's God's fault for giving us such a broken tool like "the church". Regardless of whose fault it is (it's never my own), the response is to bail on the community that is clearly holding us back. I can see how it would be easy to do that, but it doesn't seem to solve anything. In 6 months you realize that you're still not "making a difference" (meaning you haven't solved the homeless problem in your city) and the frustration returns. What do you do then?

During difficult stretches like this, I think it's helpful and healthy to readjust your expectations of what "significance" means in regard to how we serve our world and each other. It might be a good time to examine what it means to be the church and faithfully follow Christ's humble example of sacrifice and service, even in the midst of extreme difficulty. I think it's important to remember that sometimes the most "significant" thing you can do is to simply be present for the sake of others around you.

10 Books of My Summer Reading List

2010-05-03T16:27:00.000-07:00

1. Bonhoeffer; Pastor, Martyr, Prophet, Spy - Eric Metaxas

2. After You Believe - N.T. Wright

3. Hannah's Child: A Theologians Memoir - Stanley Hauerwas

4. Wired for Intimacy - William Struthers

5. Leading on Empty - Wayne Cordeiro

6. The Great Theologians; A Brief Guide - Gerald McDermott

7. Giving Church Another Chance - Todd Hunter

8. Total Church - Tim Chester

9. Father, Son, and Holy Spirit - Bruce Ware

10. The Powers That Be - Walter Wink

When People Leave

2010-04-12T10:03:00.000-07:00

As someone who is invested in the church community, as a pastor and also a participant, one of the challenges we all face semi-regularly is when people leave your community. The truth is, people leave for all sorts of reasons. Some of those reasons are good ones. There are situations when an individual or family have legitimately tried to connect with others in your church but simply cannot gain any traction. It’s sad when this happens but honestly some people will just “fit” better in another church context than what your community offers.

There are other reasons people leave that are superficial, “I didn’t like the music”, or the “teaching doesn’t feed me.” Or there is a bigger and better show down the street. It’s clear that from the beginning these people aren’t interested in relationship, but in production. I’m always torn between two emotions when those people leave. One, I’m frustrated with the consumer mentality that they have brought to the “church”. But I’m also relieved because those that come with a consumer mentality, or rather, “what can you do for me?” aren’t really the kind of people that build up or help those around them in community anyway.

The truth is, either way I don’t get angry or frustrated when people leave WHEN they have the courage to communicate 1. that they are in fact leaving rather than just disappearing or ignoring your emails, etc. and 2. they tell me why they are leaving. I don’t want to know why so that I can argue or discount their reason. I’m perfectly willing to hear people out and respect their decision. I’m not going to pretend that I know what is best for every person. I don’t. But I do want to know if there is something that we as a community did to hurt them, or if we have neglected to care for them in some way.

But I will be honest and admit that I DO get frustrated when people don’t have the courage to let us know when they are on their way out. When they just fade away or start to ignore you altogether. That is frustrating.

I can think of several people in the last three years who have left our community well. They have called, emailed, or spoken to us in person about what has led them to this decision and what they are planning on doing. And when this happens we are allowed to bless them on their way out. I have much respect for people going about it in a mature, responsible way.

But I can also think of many others who may have been a part of the community for 6 months, a year, 3 years, whatever, who just bail without letting anyone know or who intentionally avoid contact with us altogether. I find this to be a cowardly act and lose respect for people who do this. I don’t say this to be cruel or harsh, but the lack of respect for the community that it takes to bail on relationship without telling people good-bye or explaining the reason they can’t be a part of the community anymore is irresponsible and hurtful to many.

When this happens I’m basically left thinking three things: First, I realize that these people do not understand the nature of community, or their place in it. Second, I’m hurt and frustrated that there was no debriefing on the way out. That just seems like common courtesy. And finally, I eventually find myself coming to peace with it. If a person doesn’t understand the effect they have on the community when jumping ship, it’s probably not someone who cares much to invest in other people around them and maybe Evergreen isn’t the best place.

When people leave, it’s rarely easy (although I admit sometimes it’s a relief!). But I always hope people will have the respect and courtesy to let us know when they’re on their way out!

My Conversation with Dallas Willard

2010-03-17T13:17:00.001-07:00

Dallas Willard isn't an easy man to create small talk with.

What do you say to a distinguished professor of Philosophy at USC who has chosen in his spare time to write life-changing books like The Divine Conspiracy and speak to Christians regularly about spiritual practices and disciplines?

But as I got stuck sitting by him, against my will, at the Ecclesia National Gathering in Washington, D.C. I felt like I should say something to him rather than endure the awkward silence that surrounded us. I didn't realize our short conversation would leave me thinking for weeks.

I opened with, "So, did you get in from California yesterday?"

He said, "Yes."

I waited for a few awkward seconds but after that was clearly the only thing he intended to say, I followed up with: "Still on California time?" An innocent and somewhat silly question, but I was nervous and was feeling pretty wrecked myself after having just arriving from Portland the day before. His response was not what I expected.

"Let me tell you something" he said gently as I can imagine a grandfather saying to one he loves. "I used to travel a lot, and I particularly remember a 14 hour flight to South Africa where they practically had to scrape me off the plane. It was then that I heard the Lord tell me very clearly, "Dallas, when you travel I want you to do three things: fast, prayer, and memorize scripture. And if you do those things, I will sustain you." He continued, "And so I started doing those three things anytime I flew longer than 2 or 3 hours and since then I've never felt the effects of jet-lag again. He has sustained me."

At this point in the conversation I felt about a half-inch tall. Dallas wasn't trying to make me feel small, it was simply that in his presence there was no way for me to not feel small, and petty, and trite. You can sense when you are in the presence of someone that is genuine and real, just as easily as you can sense when you are in the presence of a complete phony. And Dallas is the real deal.

What I have realized is everyone is begging to sell you ministry wisdom. You can choose from about 50,000 books a year that pastors write trying to explain why their model or structure is the way to go. Ministry wisdom can be very helpful and I benefit greatly from many such books, but Dallas Willard (and those like him) gives us something far more valuable.

People like Dallas Willard are special not just for what they say, but because they model what a faithful Christ-follower looks like. After you hear or interact with such people, you're not just left with great ideas, but with a desire to be the quality of person that they themselves are. It's easy to find pastors who are wise and give you great ministry advice, it's a lot harder to find pastors who you see and think, "I want to be like that person because they are like Jesus." I hope that when I'm 75 years old, people will say that about me. But I know for now I have quite a distance between where I am now and what I aspire to be. I also know that Dallas Willard didn't become the kind of person he naturally or easily.

The two questions this conversation has caused me to ask is, "What kind of person do I want to be when I am 75 years old?" and "how does that happen?" (I actually have asked a few older pastors the latter question recently to my benefit).

How did Dallas Willard become the kind of person that he is today, the kind of person that has a gravity that most of us don't. Dallas Willard is brilliant, for sure. But it wasn't that Dallas taught anything that was brand new, novel, or ground breaking at the gathering. The power came from the fact that it was Dallas Willard saying it. And because of who he is, what he said carried a lot more weight.

I don't aspire to be a "famous" pastor. I don't care about writing a great book, speaking at conferences, being known by a lot of people who have tons of twitter followers, or making a name for myself. I simply want to be the kind of person who has the depth of relationship with God that people like Dallas Willard have cultivated over the years. If I can model for people what that looks like as I grow older, I will feel more than successful.

God's Problem and Jesus, Interrupted

2010-03-02T09:38:00.001-08:00

I started reading Bart Ehrman's "God's Problem; How the Bible Fails to Answer Our Most Important Question-Why We Suffer." Ehrman has an interesting back story as a "born-again" Christian who studied at Moody Bible, and then went on to study the Greek NT at Princeton under Bruce Metzger.

He recounts that what caused him to lose his faith entirely was teaching a class at Rutgers on the question of why humans suffer. He said as he continued how the Bible answered the problem of suffering, he not only saw varied answers to the question, but none of them were sufficient. Why didn't the God who repeatedly step in for his people Israel to save them from horrific suffering on earth still step in to save people suffering today? That is when Bart threw in the towel on his faith. And this book is basically a summary of what he discovered during his study and why he chose to stop believing in a God who is powerful and/or loving.

Another book that recently came out in paperback from Ehrman is Jesus, Interrupted.

There is a trailer for it HERE. and a bunch of reviews of the book HERE.

I enjoy reading books like Ehrman's for a few reasons. One, they challenge my thinking and some of my currently held beliefs which I think is a healthy practice. Two, a lot of people are reading and resonating with Ehrman's books (including people that sit and listen to us teach every Sunday).

Ehrman is compelling because he writes in such an honest and accessible way. Unfortunately that means there are a lot of people reading his books that:

1. Have never thought about these issues before and will simply think he's right by default.
2. Are already angry or resentful with God because of some hurt or pain in their live and will read this and it will just add fuel to the fire.
3. Are not educated in NT criticism, how the canon developed, or Theodicy to be able to intelligently interact with his arguments or see the flaws within his thinking.

That bums me out!

It's a similar phenomenon with Dan Brown novels! "Hey, did you know Jesus had a wife?" :(

Such great wisdom for living...

2010-02-23T10:54:00.000-08:00

· Don’t just pretend to love other. Really love them.

· Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good.

· Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other.

· Never be lazy but work hard and serve the Lord enthusiastically.

· Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying.

· When God’s people are in need, be ready to help them.

· Always be eager to practice hospitality.

· Bless those who persecute you. Don’t curse them; pray that God will bless them.

· Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep.

· Live in harmony with each other.

· Don’t be too proud to enjoy the company of ordinary people.

· And don’t think you know it all!

· Never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable.

· Do all you can to live in peace with everyone.

· Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God.

· Don’t let evil conquer you, but conquer evil by doing good.

...from Romans 12

Why I NEED Lent.

2010-02-11T10:48:00.000-08:00

The season of Lent is something that I do not remember participating in my Restoration Movement church background. In fact, I feel like the civil calendar directed our affairs more than the church calendar did, which is unfortunate. Instead of asking questions like, "what should we do during Lent or Advent this year?" it was more "what should we do during Mother's Day or the Fourth of July this year?" I hate that I missed out the guidance that the seasons of the Christian year offer us through the cycle of life, death, and resurrection that we experience with Advent, Lent, Easter, etc.

In fact, I remember perceiving the sentiment that Lent was primarily a Catholic practice by which people seek to earn the favor and forgiveness of God by voluntarily refraining from something (usually meat or chocolate) and that it was something that we Protestants should not be a part of. This is probably a good illustration of what it means to "throw the baby out with the bathwater."

Through the last 3 1/2 years with the Evergreen Community it has been helpful for my personal transformation to be introduced to this cycle and participate in it. As Lent approaches, I am ever more excited to spend an intentional time refocusing my heart and mind on Jesus. I'm excited to lay down those things that I have tended to rely on during the past year to soothe, comfort, and get me through life. If you're like me, you've found yourself relying on things other than God for your support and comfort.

This year I will be spending the 40 days of Lent fasting from beer. To many Midwestern friends, this probably sounds ludicrous. In fact, many would even question my faith for drinking beer (which comes from a cultural christianity that I have a hard time even understanding anymore). But living in the Pacific NW where there are more micro-breweries per-capita than anywhere else in the world it makes loads of sense. We hang out in pubs regularly, we brew our own beers, we follow beer blogs and tweets, we have theological conversations over pints. It's simply part of the way of life here.

But what I've noticed over the past year is that slowly, beer has gone from being a special drink reserved for special occasions and visits with friends, to simply something I drink whenever I feel like it, or whenever a new brew is released, or after I've had a particularly rough day, or when Seinfeld is on :) It's not that I drink a lot of beer at any one given sitting, or even tend to overindulge. It's simply that it's become standard fare with any given meal or tv show to have a pint. And in some way I have to ask the question, "is this something I've come to depend on?"

We discussed the purpose of fasting, whether during Lent or any other time a few weeks ago at Evergreen and basically it came down to a few things:

it helps us to say no to the small things, so that we will be able to say no to larger temptations when they arise.
it helps us to practice impulse control and rein in our desires.
it helps us to lay down our functional saviors and grasp on to the true one.

Even today there are people that hear that we encourage people to participate in Lent and it ruffles their feathers. They equate Lent with some kind of "works-salvation", or legalism. And truthfully it can become either of those things. It can even become a contest in spirituality in which we try to one-up each other: "I've lived off of nothing but peanut shells and watermelon juice for the last 40 days, what did you do?" But so can any other spiritual practice that we choose to participate in. Does this mean we do nothing to intentionally seek God? Should we give up praying, reading scripture, or times of silence just in case it becomes legalistic or a kind of "works-salvation"? Or course not!

And this is why I choose to participate in the 40 days of Lent. Not to mention that spending 40 days putting something to death that has become too powerful in our lives makes the season of Easter resurrection so much more powerful. I've found Lent to be difficult, challenging, and very important in my spiritual formation. I just wish I would have known about it sooner!

Life

2010-02-01T08:53:00.000-08:00

Life has been extremely good the last 6 months. God has blessed us in absolutely incredible mind-boggling ways. If someone would have told me that we would have an adorable son, own a house, and be doing what we love three years ago I would have thought they were INSANE. But as we've sought to be faithful to Jesus, God has been good to us. And when I say that, I don't mean that we haven't experienced our share of pain and difficulties. What I mean is that even in the face of pain and sorrow, God has been there for us. Even in times when things have been incredibly tight financially, God has provided through a variety of odd jobs and means. Even when Kelli's delivery went the exact opposite of how we desired it to go, we came home with a wonderful son.

February is going to be a difficult month. Kelli went back to work today. And of course Gram kept us both up all night long (more her than me). But other than waking at 4:30am to a wide-awake child, it was more difficult to see her get misty-eyed as she packed Gram's bag with his favorite toys and got ready to leave him for the day for the first time. It can't be an easy thing to do. And honestly, I keep coming back to the thought: "how do single mom's do it?" I'm amazed at their strength. We're very grateful that this will only be for a few weeks and then Kelli's mom will be in town to help out for three weeks.

After that we're hoping for some other arrangements that can keep Kelli at home with Gram more. With those arrangements we will once again be very strapped financially. It was a good few months while it lasted! Having two salaries is amazing! Wish it could have lasted a little longer than three months, but having Kelli at home with Gram is even more amazing. I would be willing to sacrifice anything for that to happen.

February will be a challenging month as we pass Gram around a little bit amongst our community, but it will make us more appreciative once March rolls around and Kelli will get to be with him during the day again. There are some real bright spots in February. My birthday for one. Turning the big 30 on Super Bowl Sunday! Plus I get to go to a church conference in Washington, D.C. to hear Dallas Willard all week. That will be awesome, but I can't imagine how hard it will be to leave Gram for an entire week! Ahh. Life is definitely not easy as new parents, but it is very, very good.

Does God's "Blessing" = Material things?

2010-01-28T07:04:00.001-08:00

I've been reading Christopher Wright's short biblical theology on salvation titled "Salvation Belongs to Our God". In chapter 3 he elaborates on the "blessings of salvation". "What does it mean to be blessed by God?" There are all kinds of answers out there. Some see God's blessing exclusively in a material sense (prosperity theology). Some see God's blessing exclusively in the spiritual sense (those angry with prosperity theology).

But as Wright explores "blessing", what he notices in the OT (particularly Gen. 1) is that it is constituted by "fruitfulness, abundance, and fullness on the one hand and by enjoying rest within creation in holy and harmonious relationship with our Creator God on the other." In fact when God blesses someone in the 88 times this word is used, it normally includes increase of family or flocks or wealth or all three.

Wright goes on to state: "God's blessing is manifested most obviously in human prosperity and well-being; long life, wealth, peace, good harvests and children are the items that figure most frequently in lists of blessing (such as in Gen. 24; Lev. 26; Deut. 28)."

For a split-second, as I read this I am uncomfortable. But he continues by critiquing the perversion of this: prosperity theology.

"It is one thing to affirm gladly that God can and does bless people in a material way, with fulfillment of life, fruitfulness in their families and enjoyment of the good things of creation. But it is another thing altogether to insist that we have an entitlement to all such things or that if we do not receive them in abundance, then either God has not blessed us or we are lacking faith."

Phew!

"Such teaching is a distortion of God's blessing in relation to material things, in the same way that corrupt sexual lust is a distortion of God's blessing in relation to our sexuality. The proper response to this kind of distortion is not to deny the good thing itself while condemning the abuse of it."

I found this to be VERY helpful correction. I get extremely wary when people claim that material blessings are from God. But then when you think about it, if God owns EVERYTHING, as I believe He does, then of course everything we receive is a gift and a blessing. I have tended to fall into this very trap (due to cynicism no doubt which Conan rebuked in me last week). Unfortunately because of the ridiculous greed and selfishness surrounding prosperity theology (or any other greedy life philosophy like "The Secret"), I have tended to reject the goodness of a material blessing at all which is just as out of balance!

There is a big difference between living out of gratitude; receiving everything with thanksgiving as a gift from God, AND selfishly and continually seeking the material blessings of God and not God Himself.

But the most detrimental thing that prosperity theology (or other worldviews) does to us is panders to the worst tendencies in us: greed, selfishness, love of money, covetousness, theft, exploitation, injustice, excessive affluence. Granted, it does so as Wright say "under a veneer of religious and spurious biblical quotation."

"If I can get rich quick by some religious activity and by just "claiming my miracle," why waste time and effort in working for it? Or even more demanding, by working for the alleviation of other people's poverty? But the answer to such false teaching is not to fall into the opposite error and regard the material world and its natural goods and pleasures as something wicked and sinful."

Is suffering God's design?

2010-01-27T19:15:00.000-08:00

Still reading through "Don't Waste Your Life" now and again when I can take it. This is where I start to remember why I rarely read a John Piper book. One of the places we part ways is when he speaks of suffering. But that's just a result of his larger system. Or what some (ironically) call the "doctrines of grace."

He says this of suffering:
"Suffering is God's design in this sin-soaked world. It portrays sin's horror for the world to see. It punishes sin's guilt for those who do not believe in Christ. It breaks sin's power for those who take up their cross and follow Jesus. And because sin is the belittling of the all-satisfying glory of God, the suffering that breaks its power is a severe mercy."

Suffering is God's design? Really? You sure it's not a result of our rebellion and part of the curse that we experience as a result of our sin as Genesis tells us? God's design? I'll let him be the one to tell that to the people of Haiti right now.

2010-01-27T19:13:00.000-08:00

Good advice for all people, great advice for pastors! Been coming back to this all week!

"Stop being angry!
Turn from your rage!
Do not lose your temper-
it only leads to harm."

-Ps. 37:8

Responding to Critics: the Contrast of Brian Mclaren and Perry Noble

2010-01-26T10:29:00.000-08:00

Two men with so much in common. Both pastors who have a heart for people to know God and experience the new life that Jesus brings. In doing the work of ministry their own unique way, both have had to listen to incredible criticism and even endure name-calling from a variety of directions. The obvious difference between the two is how they have chosen to respond to the pressure of criticism.

As I was re-reading Brian Mclaren’s illuminating chapter on the subject of fasting in Finding Our Way Again, he was explaining the impact that the spiritual practice of fasting had made in his life. Mainly, he found that as he intentionally said “no” to some of his desires and impulses for a time, it has had a cumulative effect that has enabled him to say “no” to the larger temptations in life. One of those temptations he found himself facing was in desiring to respond harshly to critics of his writings and theology.

Here’s what he wrote:

“I think back to last week, when someone sent me a link to a website where a critic of my work indulged in some high-flying religious character assassination. My reaction to being misrepresented, insulted, and mocked was quite literally visceral. I felt something tighten in my gut, strangely similar in some ways to the craving for a chocolate-covered glazed doughnut. I started thinking about ways I could get back at this fellow, things I could write that would prove to him and to all virtual reality who the better man is. It was a kind of hunger…for revenge, I’m ashamed to say, and for self-justification, and to win and to hurt rather than lose and be hurt. And sitting here not, I wonder if my ability to let that feeling go last week didn’t have something to do with letting five hundred calories drop behind the Thank You sign on a trash can door one day. A little practice at impulse control, a little practice at facing my weakness, a little practice at laughing at my pretensions to maturity and spirituality, and a new possibility was actualized…thanks to a tradition carried by a community, embodied in some mentors who shared “elbow knowledge” with me. They say that practice makes perfect, but I wouldn’t know about that. What I do know is that practice makes possible some things that would otherwise have been impossible.”

Reading through the wisdom that Brian has gained through fasting gives me hope that over the next 20 or 30 years in ministry, I will be able to make the same wise decision to respond graciously and not satisfy my carnal urges for revenge. As I thought through this I realized that thanks to Out of Ur and a whole host of other bloggers, Perry Noble has come to serve as a contrast to the kind of graciousness of which Mclaren wrote.

I write this not to indict Perry Noble, for I do not know him, nor do I fully understand the stress that he is under as a leader in a large church. It's hard enough to sleep at night as a pastor of a smaller community. But it seems from the videos that he has not been able to say no to the temptation to respond to critics in a way that could be described as “less than generous”. As I read Brian’s description about what he initially desired to do but refrained from; namely, “getting back” at his critic, “proving to him who the better man is”, “seeking revenge”, “self-justification”, “having a desire to win”, I couldn’t stop thinking of those words describing adequately what Perry Noble has been seeking by videotaping his responses to critics and then posting them on You Tube the following week.

And sadly, while there are plenty of other venues available when you fall into the trap of feeling the need to justify yourself, he has chosen to use the stage from which God has given him the responsibility of preaching His Word on Sundays. Once you start using the “pulpit” to respond to public critics and bloggers, the church ceases to be about a gathered community of Christ-followers worshiping together, and more about a pastor dealing with the hurt that comes from critics taking shots. Sunday morning is far from the ideal platform to respond to critics and unfortunately it is on those mornings where his videos have gone from ironic and embarrassing (talking bad about pastors who talk bad about pastors from the stage), to straight up self-justification (scoreboard).

As pastors, there is no doubt that we all need to process the hurt and anxiety that comes from critics as well as ask questions like, "why does this bother me so much?" After all, some criticisms are more justified than others and should in fact be taken into account, even if the critic is not a close friend. But the place for that to happen doesn’t come on Sunday mornings in a sermon. It comes in the context of trusted mentors and spiritual friends who help us process why the critics’ voice feels so destructive to our soul.

In processing the contrast of Mclaren and Noble this week, my prayer is that I will have the ability to say no to those urges that rise up within me as a pastor to seek recognition, attention, justification, and self-worth from the ministry that Jesus has commissioned me with. But instead look to the person of Jesus himself who tells me that my worth and value come from what he has done through his death and resurrection and are ultimately found in God alone.

Does John Piper know about the resurrection?

2010-01-21T12:08:00.000-08:00

While continuing to read and enjoy the challenge of "Don't Waste Your Life" by John Piper, I've noticed something that I would have guessed without reading the book. John Piper is OBSESSED with the cross of Jesus Christ. And why not? Paul was too. He made statements like, "Far be it from me to boast except in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, by which the world has been crucified to me, and I to the world." Gal. 6:14

Piper takes this and runs with it, making it the central focus of all of life and ministry. Piper interprets Paul to be saying, "Only rejoice in the cross of Christ. Paul says, Let this be your single passion, your single boast and joy and exultation."

It's not that this is all-in-all a bad thing. The cross is of crucial importance for us and our salvation! I even agree with Piper that one of the facets of Jesus' work on the cross is that he was a substitute; that he took the punishment that we deserved for our sins. He stood in our place. That is one of the easiest facets of the cross to see from Scripture. Not the only one, but an important one.

But I'm left wondering, where is the resurrection in all of this? If the resurrection didn't happen, what Jesus did on the cross is worthless! (1 Cor. 15) It still didn't achieve harmony between God and humanity. There is still not conquering of death or sin. So what's the point? You can't focus on the cross at the expense of the resurrection.

Piper states: "...for redeemed sinners, every good thing-indeed every bad thing that God turns for good-was obtained for us by the cross of Christ. Apart from the death of Christ, sinners get nothing but judgment. Apart from the cross of Christ, there is only condemnation. Therefore, everything that you enjoy in Christ-as a Christian, as a person who trusts Christ-is owing to the death of Christ. And all your rejoicing in all things should therefore be a rejoicing in the cross where all your blessings were purchased for you at the cost of the death of the Son of God, Jesus Christ."

Again, I wonder, where is the resurrection? Does it even matter in Piper's scheme? Why not make all of these statements as "the death (cross) and resurrection of Christ?" Why ONLY the cross? This seems to be a serious omission theologically.

I hope I'm wrong and Piper focuses on the significance of the resurrection somewhere in the book. I hope I can come back and apologize for jumping on his too quickly. But I've got a sneaking suspicion that the lack of resurrection will continue!

To be fair Piper mentions this: “God of God, Light of Light, very God of very God,” as the old Nicene Creed says, and since his death and resurrection are the central act of God in history..."

He acknowledges it is central but so far has only addressed the cross at the expense of resurrection.

2010-01-19T15:00:00.000-08:00

"How well he reasoned! Lunatics always do within their own scope. I wonder at how many lives he values a man, or if at only one. He has closed the account most accurately, and today begun a new record. How many of us begin a new record with each day of our lives?”

Excerpt from Dracula by Bram Stoker

John Piper and Minimal Morality

2010-01-19T12:44:00.000-08:00

John Piper is a pastor and author who I have typically not enjoyed reading, nor am I on the same page with his (strong) Calvinism. I don't have an opinion on the justification debate between he, N.T. Wright and a host of others because I don't really understand the fuss (although some want to make this discussion sound as if it is THE only discussion that matters right now). Maybe I will understand it more after I read N.T. Wright's book Justification and then Piper's response.

But in any case, one of the practices that I've committed to is in continuing to read authors that I know going in will have a different perspective than I do. It seems to me that if you exclusively read those books or authors of which you already agree, you're not really learning or changing per se, but rather reinforcing what you already believe (which can be helpful in it's own right).

But then of course you've got to recognize that you will never agree 100% with anyone, or any book! If you do, something may in fact be wrong! There will always be nuances, ideas, or directions in which you will not head. But learning doesn't come through simply agreeing or disagreeing, but through understanding. In fact, when reading someone's differing perspective, ideally at the end, I would love to be able to explain their opinion and even make a compelling case for it, even if I don't believe it. If I can do that, I know that I understand where they are coming from.

All that to say, I've started reading "Don't Waste Your Life" by John Piper in the mornings (it's convenient that I can read it on my iPhone for free). Sure, I don't agree with Piper on many issues, but despite that, there are a plethora of things that I can learn from him and appreciate about his ministry. Here is one such nugget. Wish I would have had this quote back when we were in 1 Corinthians.

"Somehow there had been wakened in me a passion for the essence and the main point of life. The ethical question "whether something is permissible: faded in relation to the question, "what is the main thing, the essential thing?" The thought of building a life around minimal morality or minimal significance-a life defined by the question, "what is permissible?"-felt almost disgusting to me. I didn't want a minimal life. I didn't want to live on the outskirts of reality. I wanted to understand the main thing about life and pursue it."

God, Parenting, and Pain

2010-01-18T11:01:00.001-08:00

One of the more profound realizations of being a father thus far is how much I hurt when I see Gram in pain. I mean, genuine pain. It's fairly easy to see when Gram is crying out in pain and when he's just being whiny. In fact, a fake cry is instantly recognizable by pitch, tone, and volume. And it has a distinct effect on me: I laugh. Every single time. His fake cry has a giggle inducing effect on me. I appreciate the acting effort, but when he's faking I don't tense up as in the real times.

This past week Gram was experiencing real pain. Unfortunately one of the difficult parts of infancy is not being able to determine what is provoking the painful screams. But when pain is real, it cannot be mistaken. I tense up, I instantly start flipping through the catalog in my brain trying desperately to figure out what could be wrong and how I can fix it as soon as possible. My heart breaks for Gram when he experiences pain. I'd love to be able to fix it, and if not, then at least help comfort him through it.

This has led me (as so many things in parenting inevitably does) into thinking of our relationship with God and pain. So often when we are experiencing real pain, we have a tendency to blame God for it, even if the pain was caused by the consequences of our own rebellious actions. God must be stunned at our assertion. As a loving Father who has expressed himself through the ultimate empathy with the human condition, including the most extreme suffering and pain by becoming one of us and dying on a cross, he must be dumbfounded; to not only be mistaken for not caring, but also for causing the pain that we experience.

Seeing Gram in pain has changed my understanding of God and suffering. God doesn't look at us suffer with indifference or neglect. But he also doesn't instantly fix everything instantly either. This leads me to two conclusions: God's heart must break tremendously when He sees his children suffer (Haiti) and there must be some meaning to be found in the process of experiencing pain. It must do something in us, to us, for us for God to allow it.

Favorite Albums of the 2000's

2010-01-06T16:27:00.000-08:00

Once again, this list in no way is trying to be a "critic's list" of the past decade, but these are simply albums that I loved and listened to more than others. Many of them has some kind of sentimental value and remind me of specific places in my life, hence why they are on this list. Enjoy!

30. Nada Surf - The Weight is a Gift

29. Grandaddy - Sumday

28. The Weakerthans - Left and Leaving

27. The Jayhawks - Rainy Day Music

26. The Album Leaf - In a Safe Place

25. The Wrens - The Meadowlands

24. The Postal Service - Give Up

23. Rogue Wave - Descended Like Vultures

22. The Killers - Hot Fuss

21. The National - Boxer

20. The Shins - Chutes Too Narrow

19. Midlake - The Trials of Van Occupanther

18. The Decemberists - Castaway and Cutouts

17. The Strokes – Is This It

16. Band of Horses – Everything All of the Time

15. The Stills - Logic Will Break Your Heart

14. Sun Kil Moon - Ghosts of the Great Highway

13. Black Rebel Motorcycle Club - Howl

12. Beck - Sea Change

11. Fleet Foxes - S/T

10. Sufjan Stevens - Illinois

9. Death Cab for Cutie - Transatlanticism

8. Elvis Perkins - In Dearland

7. Iron & Wine - Our Endless Numbered Days

6. Radiohead – Kid A

5. Josh Ritter - The Animal Years

4. The Arcade Fire – Funeral

3. My Morning Jacket – At Dawn

2. Wilco - Yankee Hotel Foxtrot

1. Ryan Adams - Heartbreaker

Top Ten Favorite Moments of 2009

2009-12-31T10:44:00.000-08:00

1. The Birth of Gram

The most beautiful and profound experience of my life. The birth was extremely emotional and exhausting for both of us (probably more her :). Something I will never forget.

Taking care of a kid can be ridiculously exhausting and can wear you out in every way. But it's also the coolest thing in the world. I love everything about him and he's totally worth it!

2. Graduating the M.Div program @ Western

Felt good completing this in three years. I loved my time there. I've heard several people say that Seminary is a waste of time.

Which typically means:

A. they went to a crappy Seminary.

B. they didn't do what it takes to make it meaningful. Like most other things, it is what you make of it. I think some people go into Seminary expecting it to do something for them it is incapable of doing.

There were plenty of frustrations along the way, but overall these three years were well worth it! I've only been away for one semester and I'm already pining to go back!

3. Buying a home.

Never thought we would be able to do this! Many thanks to a generous gift from Kelli's grandparents for a down payment that made this possible! After living in two studio apartments and a one bedroom, it's nice to have some space (especially with Gram).

It was however quite a bit of work (but mostly for Justin, Tom, Jason, Seth, Ben, Devin, Clay, Andrew, Julia, and anyone else that I'm missing right now!)

4. Climbing Mt. St. Helens

Mike Anders said it well when he said, "Had I known what all was involved with this, I probably would have said no." Amen Mike, amen.

Took about five days before it wasn't excruciating to go up a set of stairs!

Note to others: you should do a few other prep hikes before you take this one on!

5. Our trip to Lake Tahoe.

One of the perks of Kelli's Salvation Army job is getting to tag along to places where she has meetings!

6. Our trip to Bend, OR

Again, Kelli had a few days of meetings which meant I had a few days of tastings!

7. Our weekend in Seaside, OR

We spent a few days away on the beach in a room with a jacuzzi and a fireplace thanks to Kelli's hotel points!

8. Trip home to Illinois for baby shower.

Always nice to go back to Illinois and see family. Always very peaceful to go back to the small town.

9. Spring Break Week @ University of Washington

Kelli was working most of the time, and I was doing homework, but it was a nice time nonetheless. I was able to finish up the first season of Dexter.

10. Watching all 4 first round NCAA tourney games

I've always wanted to go to March Madness. This past year Garrett and I snagged tix to 10 hours full of basketball fun!

Favorite Music of 2009 - #1-10

2009-12-18T16:11:00.001-08:00

10. Mumford & Sons - Sigh No More

9. Grizzly Bear - Veckatimest

8. Dinosaur Jr. - Farm

7. The Avett Brothers - I and Love and You

6. Wilco - Wilco the Album

5. Magnolia Electric Co. - Josephine

4. Jets Overhead - No Nation

3. Great Lake Swimmers - Lost Channels

2. Gregory Alan Isakov - The Empty Northern Hemisphere

1. Elvis Perkins - In Dearland

Favorite Music of 2009 - #11-20

2009-12-17T16:29:00.000-08:00

Part Two....

20. Neko Case - Middle Cyclone

19. Cass McCombs - Catacombs

18. Strand of Oaks - Leave Ruin

17. Greater California - All the Colors

16. Phosphorescent - To Willie

15. Ramona Falls - Intuit

14. Jeremy Enigk - OK Bear

13. Sparklehorse/Danger Mouse - Dark Night of the Soul

12. AC Newman - Get Guilty

11. Ben Gibbard and Jay Farrar - One Fast Move Or I’m Gone

Favorite Music of 2009 - #21-30

2009-12-17T09:54:00.000-08:00

Alright, here we go. Counting down my favorite albums of 2009. As always these are the records I particularly enjoyed. I'm not a critic and I'm not looking for what critics look for.
This is just what I liked this year, nothing more.

30. Other Lives - Other Lives

29. Sonic Youth - The Eternal

28. John Vanderslice - Romanian Names

27. David Gray - Draw the Line

26. Monsters of Folk - Monsters of Folk

25. The Rumble Strips - Welcome to the Walk Alone

24. Islands - Vapours

23. AA Bondy - When the Devil's Loose

22. Jason Lytle - Yours Truly, the Commuter

21. Jason Isbell and the 400 Unit - Seven-Mile Island

Top Ten Nicknames for Gram

2009-12-16T11:38:00.000-08:00

10. Wham Bam, thank you Gram

9. Gram Chop

8. The Gram Reaper

7. Gram Wow

6. Little Gram of God

5. Green Eggs and Gram

4. Moons Over My Grammy

3. Grambo: First Blood

2. Gram Master Flash

1. Abragram Lincoln

Many thanks to Chris and Karli Leonardo who has helped create many a nickname (including number 1)!

The 10 Most Hated Professional Athletes

2009-12-14T16:30:00.000-08:00

10. Bruce Bowen
-Spurs fans call him scrappy, but let's just call him what he is: the dirtiest player in the NBA.

9. A. J. Pierzynski
-There are not many players in the league who haven't wanted to punch him in the face (a few have gotten the opportunity). He's an agitator by nature. No possible way to like him.

8. Ray Lewis
-This one may have to do with the whole (alleged) murder thing.

7. Manny Ramirez
-He's a total nutcase and hard to like, but I'd take him on the Cubs any day.

6. Brett Favre
-I retire, nope I'm back, I retire, nope I'm back, I retire, no wait, I'll play for the division rival.

5. Kobe Bryant
-Great player, but unlike Lebron, he's completely unlikeable unless you're a die hard Lakers fan. Arrogant, smug, whiny, everything you love to hate in an athlete.

4. Michael Vick
-No real need to give an explanation here. The hatred will probably die down however over time.

3. Alex Rodriguez
(and the entire Yankees organization)
-Epitomizes what everyone hates about the Yankees. Absurdly excessive salary, steroid user, and womanizer.

2. Tom Brady/Bill Belichick
-We'll just throw these two together. They make good company. Where do we start with these two? Can't think of anything close to like-able about either.

1. Terrell Owens
-It's sad when your own teammates hate you. The difference between T.O. and the others on this list is that for the others, there was a time (even if it was brief) where they were like-able or you felt like you should at least give them the benefit of the doubt. But T.O. has been stirring up hatred from the beginning.

Desperately trying to make the list:
Tiger Woods
The Birdman
Trevor Ariza
Jay Cutler

10 Most Likeable Current Professional Athletes*

2009-12-14T09:12:00.000-08:00

10. Chad Ochocinco - I want to hate 85. I really do. But I've enjoyed his antics over the years too much. And I think everyone else has as well. If you can decode just 1/4 of the stuff on his twitter, let me know what it means.

9. Ladanian Tomlinson - Maybe it's his Darth Vadar facemask, but there's always been some mystique surrounding LT. He's got a pretty quiet, humble presence and I like that.

8. Kurt Warner - What a story this guy has been! No one would have ever believed Warner would have the career he has. Plus he turned 67 this year and still has a shot at the playoffs.

7. Donavan McNabb - I haven't seen him congratulate (or console) another QB in the league without that QB laughing or smiling. He must be likeable.

6. Albert Pujols - He's on the Cardinals which is obviously several thousand points against him. But he's a class act and an incredible hitter. I enjoy watching him (unless he's playing the Cubs).

5. Shaq - I will be honest and admit that I used to hate Shaq. I think he's mellowed out over the years. He seems like a light-hearted goofball; someone you would enjoy hanging out with.

4. Brett Favre - This is the only athlete that legitimately deserves to be on the most loved and most hated at the same time. If I see him hug another player this year I'm going to puke.

3. Peyton Manning - Not only is he one of the best QB's ever. He's also funny. Any QB that can not only host SNL but do better than most current cast members has to be in the top 5.

2. Lebron James - He's not just a person, he's a brand. He's the best player in basketball and he's still like-able. How is that possible? Kobe is probably asking the same question.

1. Ken Griffey Jr. - You could cut his arms and legs off, and any team in baseball would still sign him in a heartbeat. That's how popular he is.

*Tiger probably would have topped this list a month ago.

Tomorrow of course I will have the 10 Most Hated Current Professional Athletes!

Best Movies of 2009

2009-12-11T11:27:00.000-08:00

I will admit up front that I am not a "movie-guy". I don't see many movies during the year and know relatively nothing of directors, actors, producers, key grips, or otherwise.

So this is really just a list of the few movies I saw that I enjoyed. This list will actually show fairly well how many movies I haven't seen this year, seeing that I can't even think of 10!

1. District 9

Aliens. Enough said.

2. Star Trek

Come on, it's Star Trek. Of course it's going to be good.

3. Up

I love animated movies! I actually went to see Madagascar when it came out....alone. Yup, just me and 20 parents with their kids. Felt a little creepy, but what can you do?

4. The Hangover

Comedies are falling on hard time! Seriously, just look at the list of comedies that came out this year. Even the ones that showed promise (Year One) failed miserably. But The Hangover gives us a glimpse of hope that it is still possible to have a fresh premise for a comedy and execute it well.

5. Taken

Chadwick Hamilton said it well when he left after the movie was over and said, "I can't believe all that just happened."

Well said, a tad on the unbelievable side, but still exciting and suspenseful nonetheless.

6. Food, Inc.

Another needed food expose, in the same vein as Fast Food Nation (the book, not the movie). The food industry is a bleak, scary world!

7. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

Are the books better? Of course, a movie can never do a book justice. But I did enjoy this HP over the others I have seen.

8. X-Men Origins: Wolverine
I know that A LOT of people thought this was a terrible movie. And maybe it was in some weird "movie-buff" type way that I am unaware of. But it entertained the crap out of me.

Movies that may make the list retroactively after I see them:

1. Sherlock Holmes
2. The Road
3. Inglorious Bastards
4. Funny People

Worst Movies of 2009:

1. Away We Go
Getting weary of "indie" movies where nothing actually happens.

2. Terminator Salvation
Sure, I saw it at midnight and was extremely tired, but this was a snooze-fest.

3. GI Joe: Rise of the Cobra
Terrible.

8 books that were an unfortunate waste of trees

2009-12-09T10:44:00.000-08:00

1. Still Standing - Carrie Prejean

I can't believe this "story" could possibly take up a whole book! I'd love to read Carrie's review of it on Amazon once she's read it.

2. Going Rogue – Sarah Palin

Spoiling her chances at a Republican nomination one act at a time! Keep it up Sarah!

3. It's Your Time – Joel Osteen

Finally, the secret formula for coercing God into blessing us with health and wealth!

4. The Lost Symbol – Dan Brown

Loved this book the first time I read it when it was called Angels and Demons. The second time was pretty good too. I believe it was called The Da Vinci Code then though.

5. How to Make Love Like a Porn Star- Jenna Jameson

I'm pretty sure those that know the realities behind the porn industry, probably wouldn't want to make love like a porn star.

6. Madonna: Sticky and Sweet – Guy Oseary

This has got to be the winner of one of the grossest titles ever.

7. 2012, the Bible, and the End of the World – Mark Hitchcock

When will people learn that Jesus really meant, "NO ONE knows the time or date"? Seems pretty easy to understand.

8. Arguing with Idiots - Glenn Beck

Any book that has a self-acknowledged goal of "shutting the mouth of idiots" won't change anyone's mind (as obvious from the name calling in the title), and only serves to make strong, obnoxious opinions louder should definitely round out any list of this sort.

Gram with his two lady friends :)

2009-12-08T09:58:00.000-08:00

Good form Gram, but I'm pretty sure you shouldn't punch Maya in the face.

Favorite Books Read in 2009 Pt. 2

2009-12-07T16:25:00.000-08:00

Ministry:

1. Re-Jesus – Hirsch and Frost

2. Strengthening the Soul of Your Leadership – Ruth Haley Barton

3. The Great Giveaway - David Fitch

4. Pastor – Will Willimon

5. Leaves from the Notebook of a Tamed Cynic - Reinhold Niebuhr

6. The Preaching Life – Barbara Brown Taylor

7. The Tangible Kingdom – Hugh Halter

Theology: (admittedly, my theological reading was greatly lacking this year!)

1. Counterfeit Gods - Tim Keller

2. The God I Don't Understand - Christopher Wright

3. The Reason for God - Tim Keller

4. Two Views of Women in Ministry

Church History:

1. Church History in Plain Language - Bruce Shelley

2. Strangely Warmed - the Amazing Life of John Wesley - Garth Lean

3. Turning Points - Mark Noll

Favorite Books read in 2009 Pt. 1

2009-12-06T15:13:00.000-08:00

This is a list of the best books I've read this year. I'll have Part 2 tomorrow which will include Theology/Ministry related books. But for now...

1. Oliver Twist – Charles Dickens

2. Candide - Voltaire

3. Brave New World – Huxley

4. The Wonderful Wizard of Oz – Frank Baum

5. King Arthur and His Noble Knights – John Steinbeck

6. The Professor’s House – Willa Cather

7. Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland

Non-Fiction

1. The Lost City of Z – David Grann

2. Born Standing Up – Steve Martin

3. Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs – Chuck Klosterman

4. The Five Dysfunctions of a Team – Patrick Lencioni

Best iPhone Games

2009-12-03T13:24:00.000-08:00

1. Surviving High School

You're telling me that I can become homecoming king, win the big football game against Wilson High and fall in love with my high school sweetheart Beth all in one game? Uh, ok.

2. Flight Control

Incredibly addictive and a great game to compete with friends. Actually, I'm pretty sure Andrew still owes me a beer for my ridiculous score. Yeah, that's right, 341.

3. Fieldrunners

First game I had on the iPhone. Takes forever to play, usually several sittings, drains the battery like you wouldn't believe, but worth every second.

4. Airline Conqueror

If you're too cheap to buy Flight Control check this one out. But you should still buy Flight Control.

5. Cows in Space

50 Levels of trying to send cows that are stuck in space home. Uh, i guess just like the name implies.

6. Traffic Rush

Similar to Flight Control, but you've got to direct traffic in an intersection so there are no wrecks. On paper that sounds kind of boring. But trust me, it's not.

7. Ramp Champ

Just started playing this one, but I love it. Old school carnival/skeeball type game.

8. Finger Physics

I think I underachieved in Physics class in high school because this game seems to think I'm awesome at it.

What are your favorites?

Top Ten (+1) Saved By the Bell Episodes

2009-12-03T09:32:00.000-08:00

Guest List: Kelli Bagby

1. Cream for a Day
When Kelly is nominated as homecoming queen, her dream is shattered as she faces the prospect of winning after she gets a zit. Zack comes up with a solution, but it does not unfold as he plans.

2. Jessie's Song
Jessie turns to caffeine pills as a result of the pressure with midterms and her singing group, ignoring Slater's warning that the pills can damage her health. When Zack finds out about her problem, he cancels her performance and rushes to her side.

3. Dancing to the Max
Zack and Slater both try to obtain Kelly as a dance partner before the big dance contest at The Max. However, Zack goes with Jessie instead. Lisa also has a date for the dance, but when she sprains her ankle, he backs out. Screech agrees to dance with her in the contest despite her injury.

4. Rockumentary
Casey Kasem tells the story of how "The Zack Attack" got together and their rise to fame.

5. Home for Christmas, Parts 1 and 2
Zack falls for a girl who works at the mall, but is unaware that she is homeless. Meanwhile, the gang is busy getting ready for their production of "A Christmas Carol."

6. The Last Dance
In order to afford a costume for the school's costume ball, Kelly gets a job working at The Max. However, as Kelly spends more time working with her boss Jeff Hunter, she falls for him and may have to tell Zack that their relationship is over.

7. The Prom
With the prom coming up, everyone needs to pick a partner, and when Zack gets to go with Kelly his dream seems to be fulfilled. However, earlier Kelly finds out that her father has lost his job, so she is not able to make it to the prom.

8. Running Zack
Zack fails another test and is told that if he fails another, he is off the track team. His teacher Miss Wentworth arranges a tutor for Zack named Chief Henry, who happens to be a Native American. Zack soon learns about his own heritage, but does not feel like going to the upcoming track rally when tragedy strikes.

9. Zack's Birthday
The gang take summer jobs at a beach resort, but have trouble dealing with their boss Mr. Carosi. Meanwhile, Zack falls for the boss' daughter, Stacey.

10. Blind Date
Mr. Belding's niece Penny is in town, and he forces Zack to take her out. Zack, however, wants to attend Kelly's party instead, so he makes Screech pretend to be him and take Penny out. Meanwhile, Lisa finds a date for Jessie, but Jessie is too self-conscious about her height compared to her date to have a good time.

11. School Song

The gang begins to compete against one another when Bayside holds a contest for who can write the best school song. Zack decides he wants to remembered for something positive and so begins to sabotage everyone else so that he can win.

Favorite Beers of 2009

2009-12-01T16:16:00.000-08:00

Ah, December 2nd and I'm already behind! I'll start with an easy one. I'm sure I've had more really good beers this year but need to start writing them down or something. These are just some memorable ones that I can think of! What did you enjoy this year?

Best Brewpub in Portland: Laurelwood
Once again Laurelwood has poured my favorite beers. They have consistent special offerings that are rarely a letdown. And if nothing looks interesting, there is always the Workhorse or the Free Range Red. Can never go wrong with those. I love this place.

Laurelwood Workhorse IPA
-This could be the best IPA i've ever had. Could drink it every day (but that wouldn't be healthy).

Laurelwood Double Oregon Hefeweizen

I'll be honest and admit that I've been a skeptic about Deschutes since I moved here. Didn't really care for most of their regular bottled beer. But a visit to Deschutes Pub in Bend changed all that. Plus they put out some great 22 oz. specials this year. Specifically:

Deschutes Abyss Imperial Stout

Deschutes Red Chair IPA

Deschutes Mirror Mirror Barleywine

Again, like Deschutes (probably more so), Full Sail's regular beers are pretty underwhelming. The Pale Ale is about the only thing I can drink. But their seasonals are great.

Full Sail Black Gold Imperial Stout
Everyone's trying their hand at a Bourbon Barrel Aged Imperial Stout (because apparently that's what all the critics love), but this was amazing. There was a two-bottle limit on purchases and unfortunately I made the mistake of only buying one. I think I liked this better than the Abyss quite honestly.

Full Sail Prodigal Sun IPA

Haven't had many beers from Firestone Walker, but the one's I've had on tap have been fantastic.

Firestone Walker DBA

Firestone Walker Union Jack

Can't shortchange the Lucky Lab since we meet there for our church gathering on Sunday. :) Honestly, there haven't been a lot of beers that have won me over at the Lab. I appreciate the always rotating taps and new offerings, but I feel like I'm disappointed a lot. That being said, two beers this year that I have really enjoyed there have been:

Lucky Lab Crazy Ludwig's Alt
Lucky Lab Barrel Aged Red Baron

This upcoming year I would really like to get my hands on some more beers from The Lost Abbey and Russian River. I've heard great things about both, but it's not poured at many places.

What beers did you like this year?

List December Begins Tomorrow!

2009-11-30T11:21:00.000-08:00

Get ready, another fun-filled month of lists! For your enjoyment, here were some of the favorite lists that Devin and I came up with last year.

Top Pro-Wrestlers of the Golden Era

Top Five Evergreeners You Wouldn't Want to Meet in a Dark Alley

Top Ten Cartoons of Yesteryear

Top Ten Candies at a Junior High Basketball Game

Worst List of Last Year:

Top Ten Young Futbol Players

Gram Keaton Bagby - 10/24/09

2009-10-26T21:53:00.000-07:00

Gram was born on Saturday, Oct. 24th @ 6:04 am weighing 7 lbs. 11 oz. and measuring 21 inches long.

It was quite an intense 48 hours. Kelli's water broke at 1am the night before and spent the next 24 hours having contractions. Needless to say, she did not get any sleep for a LONG time. Once she was in active labor she was pretty exhausted but somehow managed to get to about 9 cm. with no pain medication! Her strength amazes me! Honestly, I can't imagine bearing that kind of pain but she was incredible. When 5am rolled around we noticed a trend on Gram's heart monitor. His heart rate was dropping substantially each time Kelli had a contract and then was racing to catch up. The doctor and nurses feared that the cord was wrapped around his neck. It's possible to push and give birth even so, but with the extent that his pulse was dropping it wouldn't have been safe for her to push. So at about 5, we had to make the decision to have a C-section. I sat beside Kelli as they performed the operation and then at 6:04 I watched as they pulled the little guy out. He did indeed have the cord wrapped around his neck twice!

I'm extremely thankful for the operation and the knowledge of the medical staff to see what was going on. We heard him cry and both started crying ourselves. It was indeed the most emotional experience I have ever had. With the mix of exhaustion, fear, anxiety, and everything else, it was more than I can really describe. But to see little Gram's huge alien head (which is more normal now :) and to hear him crying and okay was a beautiful experience.

We had a very specific idea of how we wanted things to go but it wasn't long until we realized that it wasn't going to happen that way (at all). First, our nurse midwife was not on call this weekend so we had Dr. Anderson deliver. Secondly, at about 9 cm, Kelli was just too exhausted after being up for almost 48 hours and just couldn't do any more contractions so she went ahead and gave me the code word (tippeetoe-from Seinfeld ((season 2-episode 7)), and got an epidural. Unfortunately, they had a difficult time getting it in between her vertebrae so it took about 7 sticks before they got it! Ouch. And then, the C-section of course was nothing we wanted a part of. We definitely learned the importance of flexibility in labor! Wasn't near what we thought it was going to be, but everything worked out for the best and Gram is healthy so it's hard to complain.

One thing I've noticed so far is that while I was afraid of the lack of sleep, the unceasing crying, and all of the other challenges, somehow there is more strength inside of you than you know. It's only been three days but I have really recognized how God equips people with what they need to be a parent and to find a way to press through.

This has been a very spiritual experience for me. In fact, in comparison with the rest of my previous life, I feel like this is the first time when I've truly prayed. I've resonated with Matt. 5:3 from the Message version: "You're blessed when you're at the end of your rope. With less of you there is more of God and his rule." No doubt about that! There have been times when I have been reciting scriptures in my head that I didn't even know I had memorized. This has all been a very powerful and life changing experience for me and it's only been three days! I can't imagine all that I will learn through being a father in the coming years but I am excited. Tired, but excited.

On another note, the nurses at Providence were incredible. I seriously don't know what we would have done without their constant help and work for those two days. I have said this before and I believe it is true more than ever: those that are involved as nurses, doctors, medical assistants, are in my mind one of the closest professions to the heart of God. When you think about the care, compassion, healing, and humble service to those who are sick, hurting, in pain, whatever it may be, I have incredible respect for that.

Another great moment was when the hospital chaplain came to bless Gram. He was a "non-denominational chaplain" so I was surprised when he put on his yamaka :). He read a poem, read a short prayer for Gram and then recited a short passage from Deuteronomy. I really appreciated it.

I'm sure I'll have more thoughts as the days go along. But I now understand why people blog and post pictures of their kids on facebook every 5 minutes :)